Anime Addventure : Evolution
by tutcat
Summary: Stories that are from that place that have been saved. X-men and Ranma (all stories up for adoption)


Disclaimer: I do not own Ranma 1/2 or any other crossover characters. They are owned by there respective owners. Not out to make any money or fame on others work.

This is a collection of fic's I was able to save of a web archive that has shut down recently. Some had been edited so my text reader would work better. So original authors and extra stuff was removed from the fic .

On the ones that have not been edited I will be editing them so the original authors will get credited for their parts. Also if you have the parts that I'm missing let me know in a PM will edit them in. Same with other fic's if you have them will post for others to be able to read.

Evolution

Ranma: evolution: Nodoka's secret [Episode 41947]

by Demonhawk01

Ranma waved goodbye to his mom and then turned form the door, heading to the stairs.

"Where ya going Saotome?" Drawled Nabiki.

"I'm just going to take a nap" Ranma responded as he disappeared up the stairs and into his room. Ignoring the disbelieving look Nabiki shot his way. Shutting the door Ranma stared at his sleeping futon for a second before quickly slipping out the window, and then roof hopping down the street.

He had a good reason for lying, or so he told himself. IT had to do with his mother, Nodoka. He couldn't put his finger on anything specific, but the last few times she had come to visit him, she had seemed... troubled.

He had tried asking her what was wrong, but she just brushed it off. Redirecting him to tell her about his latest adventures. Ranma however was not to be deterred. No today he was determined to find out what was troubling his mother, and help her with whatever it is

As he hopped along the roofs he couldn't help but smile, apparently his danger sense was inherited more form his mom, than from Genma. He saw Nodoka down on the street looking around nervously, having to hide several times as her gaze turned to the roof tops.

"Hmm well I guess I have no choice." Ranma muttered as he pulled upon his knowledge of Genma's forbidden techniques. Rendering himself invisible to both the naked eye and chi sense.

Sure enough a few minutes later Nodoka stopped acting nervous and went on her way in a much more easy manner, unaware of her tag along.

Nodoka smiled as she felt the presence fade, the shadow on the rooftop disappearing. Such a caring boy Ranma was. Apparently she had managed to convince him that everything was alright and he had left.

Smiling Nodoka turned and headed down the street. It was for the best really, Ranma shouldn't be involved in her world. Shouldn't be put in a situation where his innocence would be destroyed and he would come to hate her. Like her other children did...

Ranma scratched his head in curiosity, still cloaked in the Goshin Dai Ryü Sei Fu. This wasn't the way to his mother's house. His curiosity enflamed even more, Ranma followed Nodoka into a rather old looking building.

He blinked as she pushed aside a stone revealing a secret compartment and placed the Saotome Honor sword inside, before sliding the stone back.

While he was pondering why his mom would hide her sword like that, things got really weird.

Nodoka turned to leave when suddenly the sound of scraping stone reached her ears. Whirling around she watched the stone slab slide back to reveal the Saotome sword, which suddenly quivered and floated up into the air, unsheathing and gleaming in the receding sunlight.

"No..." Nodoka whispered, her eye's narrowing in anger.

"Such an interesting toy you have here, Mrs. Saotome... or perhaps I should call a spade a spade, Mystique!" A dark voice commented out of nowhere.

Whirling around, her form shifting to the black outfit and blue skin that she normally wore Mystique glared into the shadows.

"What do you want Magneto?" She hissed. Damn it! She thought she kept her Nodoka identity hidden from him!

Ranma's jaw dropped and he almost lost control of his technique, as he watched his mother's form change into a blue skinned woman. A brief check of his senses confirmed that her aura was the same, this was his mother. She was one of those mutants that Genma was always ranting about.

He frowned, his own mother a mutant? That would send pops into a conniption fit. Not that he believed any of that trash Genma preached about them. Besides in the end run he had to weigh the words of Genma, a man who has repeatedly used and abused him, against his mother, one of the few people who supported him unconditionally. No contest really, Nodoka may be a mutant but she was till his mother! He tensed as a caped figure with a red bucket on his heads floated out of the shadows.

"I have need of you for a plan of mine." The master of magnetism commented simply.

"Like your other plans with me as the principle or with Risty?" Mystique spat back. "Those worked out real well didn't they? We're through Magneto."

"Very well, I suppose I could always use someone else. I hear this Ranma is quite the martial artist, perhaps he will suit my needs?"

Mystique's eyes widened. "He has nothing to do with this! He hasn't even displayed a mutant power yet! He's of no interest to you."

Dammit! That came out harsher then she meant it to, but Ranma did that to her. He was her only child that didn't hate her guts. Even though she had all but abandoned him to that foolish oaf who thought he was Ranma's father. It was odd feeling that sort of love, especially when she was used to fear and hatred from so many others. Though she was loathe admitting it out loud, Mystique liked the feeling and because of that she wanted to keep Ranma as far away from her real life as possible. Least he discover her true self.

"DO I sense some motherly concern?" Magneto chuckled in amusement. Mystique had been steadily slipping through his fingers lately, but it seems that fortune had handed him just the tool he needed to reel her back into his clutches. "Whatever will his siblings Kurt and Rogue say?"

Mystique snarled for a minute. "Damn you..." Then her shoulders slumped. "Alright Magneto, what do you want me to do?"

Magneto grinned under his helmet. Yes this Ranma would be the perfect tool to keep Mystique under his thumb. He opened his mouth to speak, but before he could...

"YOU LEAVE MY MOMMA ALONE!" Mystique's eyes widened as she saw the red blur leap over her and slam feet first into Magneto.

Ranma had seen enough. Sure Nodoka had turned out to be some mutant named Mystique, but she was till his mother. More importantly it seemed that this magneto was using her to do something that she didn't want to do. The comment about him having siblings was ignored and filed away for later consideration. What really clenched it was when Magneto tried to force her to do it by threatening to use him should she refuse. Mystique had chosen to concede to his demands, rather than have himself be used by this man.

'It was time for this 'Magneto' to learn why you didn't threaten the friends and family of Ranma Saotome!' With that thought Ranma leapt to attack, feeling the satisfying crunch against his feet.

Magneto slid across the room and slammed into the wall.

"Insolent fool! You wish to challenge the master of Magnetism? Very well, let me show you your folly!" With that he floated up and with a gesture of his hand sent flying several metal girders from the wall, which Ranma deftly dodged.

And the battle was on...

Ranma: evolution: Magnetic personalities, learn about them the hard way... [Episode 42143]

by Otakuguy

Ranma awoke in a considerably greater amount of pain than he was used to waking up in. *Damn tomboy,* he thought sourly *must've made me eat some of her slop again.*

Then he opened his eyes and realized he wasn't at the Tendo dojo. The room he was in was composed entirely of stone except for the metal bars which made up one wall and a window. The air was cool and damp and the gentle roar of the ocean could be heard out the window.

He quickly realized his nightmare from last night was no nightmare, but a harsh reality. He had fought an opponent and lost, he had failed his mother when she needed him most. And then, the memories came unbidden back to him.

"INSOLENT WELP!"

)}K-KLANG{(

"Whoa! Nice shot there, bucket head. That one only missed me by a week." Ranma taunted as the dodged yet another volley of metallic missiles. *Note to self: next time you fight some clown that calls himself 'Magneto,' stay away from construction sites."

As soon as their fight began Ranma discovered why his opponent called himself magneto, the reason being that said opponent seemed to be able to control all the metal around him with ease. Their fight had lasted only five minutes now and already it had moved two blocks. Their current battleground found them at a partially constructed building which unfortunately provided the young martial artist's adversary with all the ammunition he could ask for.

So far, Ranma's first bout with a mutant was not going so well. He had already gauged his adversary's fighting style, which was as simple as it was sloppy and frustratingly difficult to combat. Magneto simply hurled numerous heavy metallic objects at him while staying well out of the effective range of any attack Ranma would be capable of performing.

Thus far, Ranma's only working strategy was his trademark 'dodge and insult' tactic, which was working for now, but this fight was getting very monotonous very fast. In truth, the only reason he had lasted so long was because his reaction time, speed and skill were far above Magneto's own.

)}K-K-KLANGG-ANGG-ANGGG{(

"Ha,Ha,Ha, what are you aiming at? Maybe you should've spent less time sewing that stupid looking get-up and more time practicing with your aim-oomph!" The boy's taunt was cut short as he was clipped by an I-beam and sent tearing through the tarp covering the uncompleted face of the building.

"NO, RANMA!" Came the scream of Mystique who had arrived just in time to see her son get smashed across the lot and through a tarp.

Magneto ignored the frantic mother as he made an idle gesture and the tarp was ripped from the face of the building. He scowled at where the impertinent human calf should have been but was momentarily surprised to find him gone. He scoured the terrain with his eyes but still found no trace of the boy.

"Lookin' for me, Bucket-head? MOUKU TAKABISHA!"

The Master of Magnetism looked up just in time to see a bright light slam into him and knock him down about fifteen feet, and then: pain.

Ranma smirked darkly as he descended on his hapless opponent. The loser had given him just the opportunity he needed to pull off a victory. He recovered immediately after being knocked through the tarp and recognized his opportunity just as fast; the tarp obstructed the mutant's view of him, which easily allowed for a sneak attack. He triangle jumped up the beams of the uncompleted building and found himself several stories above the crimson-clad dork before the tarp was ripped off. Then, he took initiative without a second thought, the excitement from a feasible plan giving him all the confidence he needed for one of his patented ki attacks, which he launched without delay.

Now, all he had to do was keep up the pressure and make sure Helmet-head didn't regain his footing... flying... whatever, and the fight would be his.

He launched himself downwards towards his opponent and executed a vicious descending kick which could have ended the fight had the mutant not attempted to dodge.

Yet, he did and instead of taking the kick at the base of the neck where it would have broken his collar bone, he dodged just enough to avoid impact yet the foot still grazed across his chest and abdomen tearing his costume and flesh in an arc across his body. Magneto cringed from the pain but only for the slightest moment as the pigtailed martial artist grabbed his cape along his decent and used his inertia to sling the magnetic mutant towards the ground where he crashed hard on his shoulder.

Ranma smirked at hearing a satisfying crunch when his adversary landed. The fight was his now, all he had to do was render his opponent unconscious and the fight would be over. Putting thoughts to action he rushed towards his opponent.

*NO! I am Magneto, The Master of Magnetism, the liberator of all mutant kind! I will not lose to this under-evolved primate! I WILL NOT LOSE!* "NO!" And, with a last act of desperation Magneto let lose one more time with his dwindling energy.

Ranma was surprised as the rebar used in the building foundation reached out and grabbed his legs. He struggled to free himself when he noticed a dump truck left overnight by the construction crew barreling towards him. He struggled and kicked with all his might and managed to snap the rebar like a twig, right before the truck slammed into him, which didn't hurt as much as he thought it would. It was just like being hit by Ryoga, if Ryoga's fist was the size of a dump truck, either way it wouldn't kill him but he would feel it in the morning. He grabbed the grating on the front of the truck and used it to soften the blow as much as possible then he quickly, yet carefully lowered himself under the truck right before it ran head-long into a concrete retaining wall.

He took a moment to gather his wits, still not believing that he was alive and in one piece after that. Then he caught a whiff of something disconcerting. )}Sniff-Sniff{( Gas... GAS!?

He scrambled out from under the truck as fast as his injured, tired body could take him. Only to be blown across the lot and into unconsciousness.

Magneto, having had more than enough of the boy, unsheathed Mystique's trinket and sent it flying towards the boy with his powers.

"NOOOOOOOO!" Only to see Mystique throw her body on top of the boy's, ineffectively shielding him from the weapon. He stopped the blade just centimeters from impaling them both, logic quickly flooding his anger-clouded mind. The boy's taunts had almost made him forget why they were fighting in the first place.

"Please, don't." She begged with tear stained eye's, refusing to let go of the boy. "I'll do what you want. Just don't kill my boy! Don't kill my son!" She sobbed.

The master of magnetism straightened up, acting as though he wasn't in excruciating amounts of pain (and almost pulling it off, too). "Finally you heed the voice of reason, Mystique." He said as if he had planned the entire battle as a sort of charade. He then wrapped the boy's limp, charred and bloodied body in rebar and separated mother and son. "However, the boy's life is mine. If you should forget your place only once..." He left the rest unsaid as she followed him silently out of the destroyed lot, her head hung and tears of shame and fear pouring down her face

"So, you're awake." He was startled from his memories as the man he had fought suddenly appeared at the other side of his cell bars, he must have arrived during Ranma's introspection.

"You bastard!" Ranma bit out, ignoring the pain from all over his body as he stood to face his newest enemy. "Where's my mother?" He shouted into the man's face.

"She's just taking care of a few things for me at the moment. Not that it concerns you at all." He wasn't acting as though the injuries he sustained the other day were bothering him at all, while Ranma was barely blocking out the pain from his own unattended injuries.

"Let her go, you bastard!"

"And, why should I? She's mine to do with as I please, and she will be as long as she wants her favorite son to be left alive." He drawled as calmly as ever. "However, I am not here to talk about your mother. I'm here to give you the opportunity to tell me all about those special abilities you showed me during our little disagreement yesterda-"

"GO TO HELL!" He shouted, interrupting Magneto, who's eyes narrowed dangerously. Ranma scowled back in defiance.

"Very well, I'll just take the information I want when my psychic gets here. I'll decide what to do with you after that. Sabertooth!" A large scruffy man walked into view. "Watch his cell until it's time for his interrogation." With a parting scowl the Master of Magnetism left the room.

Once Magneto was out of sight, Ranma plopped back down onto a cot in the cell. He would have to treat his wounds and train hard, so he could rescue his mother from that jerk. But first he'd have to escape...

Ranma: evolution: The Hellfire Club [Episode 53786]

by HVulpes

MAgneto contacted the group on the vidphone. A handsome young man in 18th century clothing answered. "Magneto, what do I owe the pleasure of this call?" The man asked.

"I hate to say that I need your help. I need the serves of Miss Frost to examine a prisoner for information that might be of use to me." Magneto said, with false pleasentries, hating to have to turn to these young upstarts.

"I believe that it might be possible...in exchange for a favour in the future. I can send the White Queen as soon as possible once you have argeed to my terms." The young man said, with a smug smile on his face.

Magneto had to fight his feelings of disgust. Althought the Hellfire Club's Inner Circle was mostly made up of mutants with world Domination plans, they way they moved towards it through monetary means was not what Magneto planned. But the proved useful. "Agreed." He said with as much false feeling as he could. Magneto gave the co-ordinates to his new base.

"Agreed. Miss Frost should be there within the day. Out." The young man Vanished from the screen.

"You heard what Magneto wants, Emma. But I need not tell you your other job." Shaw said as he turned to his fellow Hellfire Club member.

"To see if the information might be useful to the Inner Circle and if it is, to capture it for the circle's use. I believe that could be arranged. Even if I have to bring the prisoner back to the club." Said the attractive young woman. "I won't let the club down." She said as she left for the meeting with Magneto.

Shaw poured himself a glass of sherry. 'Thinking are looking up.'He thought, ' not only will I get the info that Magneto finds valuable, but I get a favour out of the old bastard.' Shaw couldn't help but smile.

Ranma: evolution: Bye Bye! [Episode 53996]

by Philip Weigel

Ranma knew he wasn't at full health, but he wasn't going to allow that sonnavabitch to get away with hurting his mother. He looked out the window and nodded when he saw just how the mountain was set up, similar to what Taro had at his place. And if he could get to that water, he'd be able to escape. 'After all,' he thought, showing brilliance outside of battle, 'they'll be looking for a guy, not a girl.' He didn't know about Sabertooth's senses. And even if he did, it wouldn't have bothered him too much, knock the guy out and those senses are useless.

He winced, 'Damn, forgot how injured I was.' Even if he pulled this off, he'd be in a lot of pain. He glanced at the big lug sitting outside the cell grumbling to himself. "Say, I've got a question."

Sabertooth looked at him and shrugged, he didn't care what the question was anyway. "What?"

"Where's the nearest town from here?"

Sabertooth smirked, "About twenty-five miles south of here." He then pointed at the south end of the cell.

Ranma blinked, "Why tell me? Most guards wouldn't. At least in the movies they don't."

Sabertooth chuckled, "What would it matter if you knew anyways? You can't get out, and even if you did, you wouldn't get far, so just sit back and relax."

Ranma nodded, "Yeah, I'll do that." He walked back to the wall facing the ocean and sat down, on his head, and started to meditate as best he could, mainly to use his Ki to speed up his healing for the plan that he had.

Sabertooth just looked at him and shrugged, 'Doesn't matter to me what he's doing.' Let it be known that Sabertooth wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed.

A few hours later. . .

Ranma cracked an eye open, he had fallen asleep awhile ago. A quick internal check told him, yes his body was healed enough for this to work. He looked at the door and found Sabertooth leaning against it. He smirked, this was going to be fun.

He quickly got to his feet and stretched a bit, causing some joints to pop. Sabertooth looked at him and then turned his back on Ranma. Ranma smiled at him, 'Good, I hope this works. I'll only get one chance at this.' He charged a bit of Ki into his finger and walked up to the wall. While not as good as Ryoga at this, he figured he could get the move to work just once. "Bakusai Tenkentsu." Ranma whispered as he jabbed his finger into the wall. There was a small crack. Ranma frowned, 'This might be harder than I thought.' His mind went over what he had done wrong and couldn't see anything wrong with it. 'Just look for the weakest point in the rock.' He 'scanned' the rock again and noticed what he did wrong. 'Stupid, just up a bit higher.'

Ranma then raised his hand up a bit and charged Ki into his finger, jabbing it into the wall and whispered once more, this time closing his eyes, "Bakusai Tenkentsu."

The effects were instatainous. The wall exploded like someone had just used a bomb to blow it up. This had the effect of having Sabertooth get up and turn around. He gawked as he saw the destruction of the wall. "No way!" He quickly grabbed his keys and tried to find the one that would open the cell door, fumbling with them all.

"Bye bye loser." With that Ranma jumped out the hole in the wall.

Sabertooth finally found the right one and opened the door just moments after the kid had jumped. He ran to the hole to try and see if he could find where the kid was going before reporting back to Magneto. Suddenly his eyes widened and crossed as he felt something hit him hard in a very, eh hem,sensitive place. "Ouch! It hurts!" He squeeked in a very high voice. He leaned forward and felt something grab his shirt, which materialized into a hand. "What the?" Suddenly he was tossed out the hole and down the cliff. "AAAAAAAAHH!"

Ranma smirked as he crawled back inside. He felt a pang of sympathy for the guy, but he wasn't going to allow that buckethead to hurt his mother. He frowned and became invisible once more. He quickly ran out the door, stopping to pick up the keys, and ran down the hallway.

Ranma: evolution: Ranma's Weakness [Episode 54062]

by HVulpes

Ranma was wondering invisible through out the building looking for a way out. He had been looking, but hadn't found any way out yet. It was strange. It was like this place didn't have any doors. It had windows, but no outer doors.

He had just decided to try to find a window or air shaft to get out of, when he stumbled on top of it. The Kitchen. His Saotome stomache rumbled. He hadn't eaten for hours. Plus he needed to replenish his reserves to make up for all of the healing that he had done in his cell.

Letting his invisblity slip, he started to fix himself a snack and get a few drinks. Something to tide himself over till he found his way out of this prison. He had it eat a bit and stuff a lot of the food in doggie bags in his pockets. The dishes were still out, when he had heard some noises. Ranma stifted into invisablity, just in time to see some teens enter the room."

"Who made this mess?" one of them asked.

Ranma: evolution: Something stupid, this way comes! [Episode 54080]

by Otakuguy

*Its official, I've been abducted by a bunch of buffoons.* Ranma thought to himself as he watched his newest batch of enemies fight amongst themselves. Mutants or not, this was just plain pathetic.

"I tell you already, I did not make mess. Why are you not believing me?" The large man yelled to his smaller companion.

"Just look," the smaller man yelled back. "Who else here eats this much food at once, or has such weird tastes?" Honestly! Who puts bananas in tuna fish sandwiches?

"Sabertooth." Said the third and final member of the trio, a young man standing somewhere between the heights of the other two in a trench coat.

"Besides him."

*Alright, that's enough.* Ranma thought as he quietly crept out of the kitchen. All things considered, he hoped word of this never got out, it was just too embarrassing. And, without so much as a parting glance he left the kitchen to find the fastest way out of that hell hole, and ran head first into Bucket Head, himself. "Oh, shit!"

*Why did I even bother with the Hellfire Club?* Magneto admonished himself. He knew Mastermind owed him, yet he went to those wet-nosed upstarts anyway. He cringed to think what their assistance would cost him, especially in pride and dignity. Both were immeasurably valuable commodities when you were a megalomaniac with plans of world conquest.

For instance, he was currently still in a significant amount of pain from both the large gash carved in his chest by that young whelp's near miss, and his shoulder which was still swollen and sore from when it had been dislocated when the same person threw him to the ground. But, despite the pain he walked straight and tall, with dignity, not giving the slightest hint of his severe discomfort. Was he not so concerned with appearances he would have stayed in bed for the day, and subsequently every day for the rest of the week.

And, keeping up appearances means making appearances, which was why he was currently hunting for one or more of his acolytes to rant/preach to about mutant supremacy and how much better the world would be once he was in charge. Just then, he heard a commotion coming from the mess hall, and decided to investigate. Once he got a little closer it was obvious the commotion was an argument between his acolytes or the currently present ones anyway. Absently he wondered if he should rant/preach about proper team work and moral instead.

However, before he could decide he ran face first into nothing (which was a lot harder than he thought nothing could be). He held his sore face and watched as the air in front of him shimmered and materialized into the pigtailed boy he had fought the day before. They both stared at each other for several long moments, shock and disbelief written clearly on their faces but saying nothing until...

"YOU-" That's all Magneto got to say as Ranma recovered from his surprise a fraction of a second before the mutant and decided to act instead of speak. The boy quickly shot forward and buried his right fist into the man's stomach, forcing the wind from him. Then he slammed the same fist into the back of the man's head when he bent over, delivering him into unconsciousness.

The acolytes, who had heard their leader's shout over their own arguing rushed into the corridor, where they found their leader unmoving on the floor and an unknown Asian boy with a pigtail standing over him. Some reacted faster than others. The first was the tall muscular dude with the Russian accent who rushed towards the pigtailed boy with little more than a mean grunt.

Ranma dodged the guy's first punch but stupidly placed himself with his back to the wall. When the tall young man threw his next punch Ranma barely ducked under it and heard the cement wall behind him shatter. *This guy's tough, maybe tougher than Ryoga. I have to finish this quick,* he thought to himself as he shot a hard trio of amaguriken speed punches to his opponent's solar plexus.

)}K-K-KLANG{(

The pigtailed boy looked up in surprise and noticed that his opponent now had metal skin. How 'bout that. Cradling his bruised hand when he should have been dodging, the young martial artist was unprepared for the hard gut punch that sent him through the hole in the wall behind him.

Colossus stepped away from the hole leading to the unlit room beyond, looking rather pleased with himself.

"Is he finished?" Pyro asked as he fished his lighter out of his pants pocket.

"If he no' then he will be soon, no?" Gambit answered almost casually as he tossed a handful of glowing poker cards into the opening.

Pyro smiled as the cards exploded in the other room. "My thoughts exactly." He said as he made a show of igniting his lighter and pulling the flame away with his free hand. Then, he rared back and threw his hand forward, a long continuous stream of fire erupting from his hand where a fireball used to be. "Burn, baby, burn!" He shouted with glee.

"HIRYU SHOTEN HA" Was what answered him.

The acolytes were surprised when the stream of fire coming from Pyro started expanding and then diffused into a small horizontal tornado. They watched dumbly as the gale-force winds slammed into Pyro and knocked him back into the kitchen, and shortly after into unconsciousness. Which is why they missed seeing Ranma jump back through the opening in the wall and clap his cupped hands over Colossus' ears.

Colossus lunged toward him again with a punch but suddenly found himself without a sense of balance and ended up stumbling past his adversary and through the same hole in the wall he had made. Gambit through a trio of charged cards towards the pigtailed martial artist who just barely dodged them by a hair's breadth.

Ranma jerked away as he saw something bright flying towards him out of the corner of his eye. His eyes narrowed as he saw a trio of glowing cards fly past him and explode as they hit the wall a few feet away. He rushed towards his new opponent, hoping he wouldn't risk using those things at close range, and was almost surprised when he pulled out an extendable Bo staff. Ranma ducked under a high swing aimed for his head and side-stepped a body shot. He sent out a kick to Gambit's stomach only to have it miss when his opponent stepped back from it. He ducked under another high swing but was able to sweep the Cajun's leading foot out from under him, but Gambit expertly flipped over Ranma, using his staff as a support. Ranma raised an arm on instinct just in time to block a shot to his head from behind. He then grabbed the staff and twisted it out of Gambit's hand, twirled it in a low arc and smashed it into his groin. Gambit's oddly colored eyes snapped open and he tried to gasp for air as he was flipped over onto his head and lost consciousness.

Ranma tossed the bo staff onto the floor with a dull clang, and looked tiredly over his downed opponents before resuming his search for the exit. He only got took two steps before Colossus burst through the wall again and charged right for him. *Dammit I forgot about him!*

Ranma quickly dodged every punch thrown at him, zigzagging left and right as the punches came faster and faster. Colossus had dropped all pretense of defense and was going for an all out attack, not that it really mattered. He wasn't nearly fast enough to touch Ranma, and his metal skin rendered the martial artist's punches ineffective. So the two danced around each other in a one sided game of tag but with Ranma at a severe disadvantage being tired and wounded from previous fights.

Their dance continued until Ranma missed his footing and tripped one of his downed opponents. Magneto moaned loudly when Ranma tripped over him, signaling his eventual return to consciousness. Ranma heard him and started formulating what would be a risky plan. But any plan was better than none.

Ranma Quickly got up and started dodging. Left. Right. Left, again. He positioned himself so that Colossus was between him and Magneto, then, when Colossus over extended a punch, he dove under the extended arm and rolled to a stop right beside the still insensate master of magnetism. He waited for the large metal man to turn toward him and tried to punch him yet again. He waited until he was fully dedicated to the punch, until his fist was too close to stop it in time. When it was he grabbed Magneto and pulled the mutant in front of him so that he took the whole of Colossus' punch and was knocked through an adjacent wall.

Colossus stopped when he noticed he had hit someone who was not the pigtailed intruder. He looked from the pigtailed boy, to the new hole in the wall, and back again.

Ranma pointed towards the new hole. "Your boss." He said simply, and waited for the information to register on the large brute's face. Slowly his face contorted into a look between anger and rage and he lashed out with a sloppy hook. Ranma dodged the punch and clapped his cupped hands over Colossus' ears again. When Colossus tried to punch him again he lost his balance and Ranma grabbed his extended arm and tossed him over his shoulder towards the twice-downed Magneto. Then employed the Saotome final technique.

"I'd say it's been fun but it hasn't. Sayonara, suckers!" He said as he ran away from his enemies as fast as he could.

"DAMN YOU!" Colossus yelled as he ran after the fleeing martial artist. But, the metal plated brute was nowhere near fast enough to keep up with Ranma, even on one of his bad days. And, today was definitely a bad day.

*Dammit, I swear I must've been all over this place, and I still haven't found one stinkin' door.* Ranma thought to himself angrily. He knew that the longer he stayed her the more chance there was that Metal-head would find him or that Bucket-head would wake up. *Oh, well at least I know of one way out.* He thought as he ran back to his cell.

When he got back to his cell he immediately went and checked the hole in the wall. He whistled to himself as he looked down the cliff face and estimated the drop to be at least seventy meters. The good thing was that the water at the bottom looked pretty deep so as long as he cleared a twelve meter jump he should be fine. And, he could clear twelve meter jumps in his sleep.

"YOU!" Ranma looked down to see the large scruffy man he had thrown off the cliff earlier. He was covered in deep cuts and bruises, but had still managed to climb all the way up to the opening again.

"Hey, it's you! I gotta say I'm impressed." He commented a little bit too cheerfully.

"I don't give a #$% whether you're #$%ing impressed, you little #$%. I'm gonna #$%ing #$% your #$% #$% until you can't #%% no more!"

"Tsk, Tsk, language!" Ranma admonished with a boot to the face. He watched as the scruffy man bounced down the cliff face yet again. It was mean, he knew that, but he was feeling spiteful at the moment.

With that finished, he took a couple steps back and made a running jump off the cliff, and dived into the water below.

Ranma: evolution: Anything can be training [Episode 54996]

by dogbertcarroll

Ranma watched Sabertooth climb back up the cliff yet again, as she pretended to swim off. Hiding among the rocks, she spent an entertaining quarter of an hour just listening to the man cuss as he struggled back up the cliff, and a boring twenty minutes following that listening to him repeat himself.

'Heh. He looks like a drowned dog.'

He had been thinking of leaving, but why? He had everything he needed here. Training opportunities like this group didn't come along every day. They had powers and abilities that actually pushed his limits.

'I wonder if he smells like one?'

Lately he had felt like things were slowing down. Ryoga and Mousse weren't really putting their hearts into fighting him anymore. Kuno was a joke. Akane and the rest of the fiancées were driving him nuts in between the half hearted battles that did occur with the guys.

'Gods he's slow. Next time I'm picking someone who can climb decently as a witness. This is takin forever.'

Happosai had told him that even he needed a break every once in a while, and since he had no hentai activities planned Ranma couldn't really spar with him. He had offered to bring him with him for the Victoria Secrets Summer Jubilee held in Milan (apparently he was one of their secrets) when he checked the latest designs for flaws, but Ranma really hadn't been that interested.

'Man I'm hungry. I used up a lot more ki then I usually use.'

Cologne had been the most helpful, giving him hints abought Amazon techniques and forgotten martial arts lore. She wouldn't train him in the arts themselves tho'. She said that it would be a lot more satisfying to see what he came up with without knowing the techniques themselves.

'Maybe a ki blast would speed things up? Nah, they have to think I'm gone for this to work.'

He had to admit she was right abought that. He had developed a dozen or so techniques that had been quite entertaining. Not that useful in combat mind you, but quite entertaining. Apparently only when he was really pushed did he come up with useful combat techniques. The rest of the time he developed interesting non-combat techniques.

'Man I'm hungry. Is that a shark down there?' Taking a deep breath Ranma slid beneath the waves.

His attempts at learning the 'Splitting cat's hair' technique, from just what he remembered of it the first time had been fun. He hadn't even come close to the original, but then his could move like the original couldn't, not to mention it didn't have to be an image of himself. Toma had taught him quite a bit without knowing it.

'Hey, that is a shark.'

He could make one image without too much trouble but beyond that he would have to sit still and concentrate for it to work. Not real useful in combat. Plus anyone with the slightest amount of Ki sense could see it was a fake if they tried.

'Mmmm, Shark meat.'

Cologne had taught him a trick she had come up with after facing martial arts ventriloquists. Using a Ki resonance technique you could not only throw your voice but duplicate practically any sound you could think of.

The water churned and took on a pink tinge as bits of flesh floated to the surface.

That had been a fun week. Between the two of them they had caused enough trouble that the Ghost Busters had been called in. Spengler had made them promise not to do it again and Bake-Neko had been captured, but all in all it had been fun.

'Needs soy sauce. I wonder if they have tuna in these waters?'

Ranma: evolution: Candy is Dandy! [Episode 100424]

by dogbertcarroll

Ranma darted up the side of the cliff like lizard. Quickly and quietly, darting here and there to avoid catching a watcher's eye by forming a patern of movements. He ducked under an overhanging section of rock, when he heard movement above him in his former cell, he listened to Sabertooth. . . sniffing?

He froze as his stomach rumbled in contentment.

'Did my stomach just purr? Damn I've never felt this full before. I can't believe I ate that much!'

Sabertooth frowned as he stared down at the feeding frenzy at the base of the cliff. The waters were filled with blood and bits of flesh.

"Damn, The boss ain't gonna be thrilled with me for losing his %^&* hostage." He shrugged and strode off deeper into the base unaware of the groups recent problems.

A little judicious use of the Umisenken and Ranma easily slipped past the battered crew, who were currently more concerned with dragging the unconscious and bleeding Magneto to the medical bay, then a martial artist Sabertooth had said was currently in the belly of abought a dozen sharks.

Searching for a safe place to digest the rather large meal he had consumed and thinking up a couple of ways to use his 'death', he ran across a locked room with 'Do Not Enter on Pain of Pain' printed on it. It kinda contrasted with the red and black roses on the border, or complimented it if you looked at a certain way. Not being Kodachi, Ranma decided to skip that line of thought.

He was pretty sure it wasn't a guy's room, not unless this group was freakier then he thought, and he couldn't sense anyone inside so it should be safe for tonight.

He didn't figure any of these losers had regular girlfriends. Not that he knew what regular girlfriends were like, considering who his fiancées were. All in all he didn't think ANY female would come here willingly unless they paid her, so it was probably safe.

Emma Frost sneezed and rubbed her nose wondering if her whole 'white leather and fur lingerie' look was really wise on the coast. It would be kind of ironic if 'Frost' caught a 'cold'.

Grinning to herself she dismissed the thought as Hopscotch, a cute little 9 year old girl that looked suspiciously like a young Jean Grey, teleported her into Magneto's fortress.

"Ahem!" The cute little girl's eyes took on the look of a teamster during a salary negotiation meeting as she let go of Frost's hand and held out a palm.

"Don't worry I'd never forget to add the appropriate tip for my cabbie." Frost grinned as she reached into her purse and pulled out a handful of butterscotch candies that she handed off to the young mutant.

Hopscotch considered whether the gratuity was enough for a moment before shrugging and porting out. She wasn't particularly fond of butterscotch, as it was Frost's nickname for her, but come to that she wasn't particularly fond of Frost.

Frost had tried to probe her when they first met and that was just plain rude as far as Hopscotch was concerned. Now if she had given her chocolate instead of butterscotch, Frost's little running joke, she would have warned her abought the premonition she had had.

Ranma stepped out of a nice hot shower feeling quite a bit better abought life in general and his situation in particular. Dropping his clothes in a pile next to the largest bed he had ever seen he decided he's deal with everything much better after he'd gotten a good nights sleep. He was unconscious before his head hit the pillow.

Wanda sighed heavily as she entered her room, not even bothering to flip on the lights. Her bed was practicaly pulling her in amd she was exhausted. It wasn't the grueling schoolwork from a principal that hated anyone different that was doing her in, it wasn't even the latest battle with the X-Men, it was Toad.

He had asked her out continually since they had first met. Saying no hadn't been enough, disdainful looks and sneering comments on his manhood hadn't phased him. Blasting him with a hex bolt just made him think she was playing hard to get, but his latest attempts to woo her went beyond the bounds of sanity.

Finally deciding that if she spent one more second in his presence she was either going to go mad or remove him from the gene pool she decided to visit 'dad'. A weekend at the base putting up with him was preferable to committing homicide, but just.

'Thank God for Hopscotch' She though wearily to herself. That little girl had been a literal godsend. Hopscotch always seemed to show up just when she needed her.

With that happy though she dropped her clothes on the floor and surrendered to her bed's pull.

Ranma: evolution: Cold Hands, Warm. . . [Episode 100511]

by dogbertcarroll

The ventilation system in Magneto's fortress was a marvel of modern engineering. When called upon it could clear any foreign contaminants in the air from the complex in just under five minutes, using an advanced filtration system that could theoretically make them independent of outside air sources as long as the system had power.

The main purpose of this was to prevent the occupants from being subjected to gassing by outside forces. Magneto however chose it because it reduced the number of times the fortress needed to be dusted to once every fifteen months of active use. While this may seem like a small thing, one only had to picture trying to get those under his command to do housework on a regular basis, without causing massive damage to what they were trying to clean, to realize what a cost savings this was, despite the expense.

There was regrettably one small problem with this. It reduced the sound proofing in the rooms to a degree. Not a large degree, but enough of one to make a quiet room fill with the subdued murmur of bits of conversation from other parts of the complex when the filters switched modes.

"…smelling salts…" "…Frost…lost him…" "Sharks ate…%^&" "Hostage in…" "Mother of…"

Hours passed as two bodies shifted uneasily in their sleep moving slowly closer to one another.

"Dead…" "…sure of…" "May…sense…" "Probe…" "%*&^*&…."

A soft contented sigh is heard from the two as contact is made and warmth is instinctively snuggled into.

"…can…" "Not….how…sure?" "Probe…" "Fine…" "$%^&$…"

A slight whimper is heard from one of the figures briefly before the other murmured something equally indistinct and arms were repositioned.

"why…acting…normal?" "Mrrrowww!" "…cat?" "Ahhhhh!.." "Holy…^&*"

Something poking one of the figures in a tender spot is noticed and a hand sleepily reaches back to move it. Feeling something a bit cold touching a sensitive part of it's anatomy the figure responds by moving it's hand in a similar portion on the other figure and pulling it closer, trapping the hand in place while moving it's own hand to a much warmer position.

Loud bangings, and the occasional scream, echo through the complex bringing both figures into a state of full wakefulness as it passed by the bedroom door.

"Ummmm, Hi?"

"Hi yourself."

Fingers are wiggled a bit while their owner tries to figure out why his hand feels so warm.

"Ohhhh!"

The owner of his current hand warmer responds by tightening her grip a tad and trying to catch her breath.

"Eeeppp!"

Simultaneous realization between the two of exactly where certain hands are at the moment cause them both to freeze in place.

"This may seem like a strange question, but do you have any idea how we ended up like this?"

Wanda listened to him babble for a minute as she just made approving noises at what seemed to be the right places. She was sure that if she waited long enough he would calm down and begin to make sense. She was also wondering why she felt so calm and … contented? Shouldn't she be angry and pissed right now? But feeling how nervous and panicky the guy was she could tell whatever had occurred he hadn't meant to be in this position with her.

After abought five minutes of incoherent babbling, that sounded like it was lapsing into a foreign language at times, she had only caught a few words that stood out. Kidnapped, Sharks, Dead.

She could feel him relax a little, most of him anyway. As he took a few deep breath and his pulse slowed down from marathon runner into something approaching normal she was distracted by the thought that she hadn't know you could take someone's pulse there.

His fingers moved again causing her to hiss softly "Can you please not do that?" The brief thought to add 'until we are better acquainted' was swiftly squashed.

She could feel his reaction to that quite well. His pulse went up once again and he was on the verge of panicking, while a certain part of him still seemed quite happy with his current position. Mixed emotions for sure.

Heck, that sucker was a lie detector in her hands. 'I wonder if he can read me as well in this position?'

"Sorry,sorry,sorry. I'm just use ta' tapping my fingers on something hard when I'm trying ta' think sometimes."

"I'm afraid the only one really qualified to tap their fingers on something hard in our present position is me."

"Ummmm, could we maybe move now?"

Although she was unreasonably comfortable where she was and the thought of just going back to sleep was tempting, she realized that the sounds of combat outside and the fact that she was currently soaking his hand in something that most definitely wasn't Palmolive would make it very hard to sleep.

"I suppose." She knew she sounded decidedly unenthused abought the idea, but seemed unable to hide that fact. Of course with his hand where it was he would have to be the most naïve man in the world not to realize that.

"Achoo!"

"Bless You!"

"Thanks."

Having reluctantly separated and moved to opposite sides of the bed, they paused to examine each other.

"I'm Ranma Satome, sorry abought this." 'Wow. She ain't violent or nothin'. I think even Kasumi would be pounding me if we woke up like this.'

"Wanda Maximoff, don't sweat it." 'Those are the most open eyes I have ever seen in my life. You can practically read his mind through them.'

"Where'd she go?"

"So what do we do now?" 'I'm going to have to have him explain everything again now that he's calmed down.'

"Well usually someone will bust in right abought now and scream that I'm being a pervert and beat the hell out of me." 'Wow. She still ain't hit me or insulted me or nothin'.'

"Get this loony #$%& off me!"

"This happens to you a lot?" Wanda seemed stunned by the thought.

"Well, kinda. Only usually it's either a Chinese Amazon or a loony gymnast, and it's my bed and I'm wearing something, and it's never been that intimate a position. Occasionally it's a uncute tomboy that our pops stuck in my bed." 'Oh yeah, that helps. She'll really think I'm a pervert now.'

"I really don't know how to respond to that." Why does he seem so unhappy with all those girls hopping in his bed? Aren't guys our age suppose to be immature and sex crazy like Toad? I know he's not gay.

"I don't blame you. It's my life and I don't even know what ta do at times." 'She didn't insult me or hit me? American girls rock. Cute and patient.'

'Jesus, I really can read his thoughts!'

The door jumps on its hinges as something slams into it hard enough to leave the imprint of a fist in the steel. Glancing back at Ranma she can see his form waver a bit. Blinking she looks closer and opened her senses the way Agatha had been training her to do.

'There's no body. He's composed of pure life energy.'

Ranma's form wavered and vanished as she reached out to touch it.

"Ranma?" 'What is going on here?'

She's shaken out of her stupor by the sounds of her door being twisted off it's hinges. Quickly grabbing clothes off the floor she ducked into her bathroom.

Ranma: evolution: Kaning can be a learning experience, even if you're not a vandal. [Episode 100612]

by dogbertcarroll

Ranma, safely wrapped in the umisenken, winced in sympathy at seeing the White Queen sink her teeth into a rather tender section of Sabertooth's anatomy. 'I don't even want to know.'

Watching Sabertooth try and hit himself in the rear, with the door to Wanda's room, sparked memories of his own training as a child.

"As soon as you can take this pebble from my hand you will have learned all I can teach you." The Shaolin priest held out at a hand with a small pebble sitting in it, expecting the small boy to attempt to grab it.

The kick to the groin however was a complete surprise.

The fact that the little boy was now wrapped around his arm, and seemed bound and determined to gnaw his hand off at the wrist, was likewise something he never expected to deal with.

Hiting the boy over the head with his staff, while trying to pry him loose with his feet, seemed to be ineffective. So he had to rely on an ancient secret that all teachers learn at some point in their careers.

Lie and pretend you meant for everything to occur the way it did to teach the pupil a valuable lesson. Even if the pain in your groin was crippling and you were sure he had opened an artery with that last bite.

The purpose of the pebble exercise was to awe the boy with your speed so he would strive to learn. Well if you can't awe with speed go for trickery and make it look like wisdom.

"You lose boy."

Ranma paused moving his mouth just enough for his words to be heard without giving the priest a clear shot at removing him.

"What?"

"I said, you lose boy."

"How did I lose? I got your arm, so I got the pebble."

"You lose, because you not wait long enough to find out the rules to this test, and the rules say you have to get pebble without violence."

"So I should listen to the whole rules thingie before I make a move?"

"Exactly. Knowing the rules will allow you to see a better way to break them!" 'I didn't mean to say that. Although it's probably how he'll see it. Little boys are always that way.'

"Wow." Ranma seemed genuinely impressed with his new sensei as he unwound himself from his arm. "You're even sneakier then Pops!"

Not sure if this was a good thing, and feeling that he had been insulted in some way he decided just to continue with the lesson.

Ranma smiled at the memories of one of his favorite teachers before deciding to find another place to sleep for the night.

'Preferably one not already occupied by a beautiful naked female.' *blink*

'I mean by a girl. An ordinary girl.' A small portion of his mind piped up 'Who even tho' I was in a really embarrassing position with her didn't hit me or blame me.'

Deciding not to open up that can of worms, he snuck off as Wanda came out of her bathroom glowing with power and ready to solve her own sleeping problems in a way Ranma would have readily agreed with, having used a similar method on Genma too many times to count.

'Now where can I find an open bed?'

Ranma: evolution: What necrophilia means to me [Episode 100795]

by dogbertcarroll

Wanda watched the chaos with a little amusement and a lot of anger. She had been peacefully enjoying…. sleeping. Quite happy sleeping wrapped up in his… her blankets. Nice warm and comfy blankets. She had never felt blankets that solid before!

Then these 'people' had to ruin it!

Pyro and Colossus decided discretion was the better part of valor and fled the scene.

While subduing Frost was a job they felt qualified for, despite the fact that they had been fighting her for over an hour and had done nothing but add to the damage total, facing Wanda while she was walking six inches off the ground and glowing with power was something else entirely.

Gambit had yet to notice the pissed off witch behind him and was gleefully whacking Sabertooth with his staff, missing Frost completely. The fact that Sabertooth had already ripped the door off his quarters, and completely trashed his room fighting Frost, was surely just a coincidence.

Sabertooth was covered in cuts and bruises, desperately trying to evict Frost from his clothes.

Frost meanwhile was somewhere in Sabertooth's pants and could only be seen as a rapidly moving bulge. The speed she moved at and the amount of damage she had done over the last hour had him in a state of understandable panic. This was one area where he had never tested his healing abilities, and had no intentions of trying, ever.

As the air began to feel heavy, like just before a storm, Gambit and Sabertooth slowly turned towards the angry young women. Frost's eyes even peeked out through the zipper of his pants curiously.

Ranma paused outside the medical bay as the floor shook. Shrugging it off as not being his problem he set off to find Magneto's room. From the looks of things she wouldn't be needing it any time soon. Yawning widely he covered his mouth and paused, sniffing his hand.

Wanda smiled grimly. She felt the warm glow you usually get when you blow up someone you really don't like. As the glow seemed to shift south of it's usual spot she decided she might have enjoyed this a little too much.

Ranma paced back and forth in Magneto's bedroom, his mind dwelling on recent events.

He knew that others had different standards of what constituted perversion, so depending on where you were different things were perverted. For instance, from his time spent with Wanda it appeared that doing something on accident wasn't perverted. While if he had been with Akane it would have been perverted enough to make Happosai shed a tear of joy that his 'heir' was following in his footsteps. Right?

Ranma paused for a moment and noticed he was sucking on one of his fingers again. 'Arrrgghhhh! I really am a pervert!' Heading for the bathroom he decided that a nice cold shower was just what the doctor ordered.

Finding a nice warm glow encompass her, along with thoughts of Ranma, she mentally shook it off and started questioning Gambit again.

"So you're saying Ranma was kidnapped, brought here and then got eaten by sharks?"

"Exactly. Sabertooth saw the whole thing. Blood, water, bits of stuff floating."

Wanda winced. OK, that did explain quite a few things. It followed what she had caught from Ranma and explained why all she could sense was life energy. He was dead. That thought was actually painful, but it fit.

He had died a violent death here. He was a disembodied spirit. That's why when she reached out he had vanished. The rest must have been a dream. He was just looking for some comfort before he passed over and being the only person not involved in his death he had been drawn to her.

Feeling a bit depressed over the whole mess she decided to get some more sleep and contact Agatha before dealing with this. The hollow feeling in the pit of her stomach was just sympathy for a poor lost soul. It couldn't have been because she had just lost someone she seemed to connect with before she even had the chance to know him. Right?

Ranma: evolution: Pop Quiz! [Episode 100831]

by dogbertcarroll

She had tried to go back to sleep in her room, but the draft from the missing door and not having Ranma there to keep her warm…. enough blankets to keep warm she had finally gotten up and decided to see if Agatha had some ideas on what was going on.

Wanda had called Agatha, or rather she had tried to call Agatha. The old bat had a lot on the ball and had an answering machine message ready to deal with the problem. Sort of….

"This is the home of Agatha Harkness. I'm not in right now so if you leave your name and number I will get back to you when I return. Unless of course you are my no account student Wanda, in which case I would suggest you look through your notes. I did tell you that you were going to be tested on everything that you had learned last week and that you had better take good notes. All life is a test and this week is an important one. Bye."

Last weeks lessons had covered magic and the supernatural in the Far East, Mainly concentrating on the various forms of the undead with side notes on Chi Sorcerers and High Level Martial Artists. Thankfully she had taken great notes on the undead. Notes on Chi Sorcerers and High Level Martial Artists would be pretty useless in this situation.

*Rumble*

'Must be storming pretty badly outside.'

Flipping through her note book to the appropriate section, she had quickly skimmed through.

'Jikininki, Asian Ghoul… hunched bodies are covered in blisters, abrasions, scars, infections and almost completely devoid of hair. Nope.'

'Hopping Vampires … the Mandarin-clad guys, who are so stiff in death that they can only hop. These undead are blind, and home in on their prey's breath. He was stiff... But not like that.'

'Asian vampires need to drink blood to get a har… nope. Definitely not a vampire.'

'Shi-ryo… doesn't realize they are undead. Nope, he mentioned his death so that's not it.'

'Kuang Shi… like a golem… no paper. Scratch that.'

'Youma… sucks energy, female and rather silly looking, usually followed by magic girls almost as silly looking. Nope.'

'I need something that can become incorporeal. Something like ghosts, but that can materialize.'

'Bake-Neko, ghost cat… Currently held by the Ghostbusters. Nope.'

Most Asian ghosts fall under either standard categories, as in the west or belong to the name rank section. Meaning they have powers and abilities that varies from individual to individual. Dealing with them is a unique experience, just as they are themselves. The most important aspect of dealing with a unique spirit is research. The more you know abought them the better able to deal with them you will be.

'Great. Just… great. Well I suppose I can always ask him abought himself if I get to see him again.'

'I can't sleep here. Dad is still in the infirmary so his bed should be open.'

Ranma: evolution: Life's Lessons [Episode 101576]

by dogbertcarroll

"I can't believe you did that to your apprentice." Caine chuckled appreciatively while settling back into the loveseat as the answering machine clicked itself off.

"Well I did warn her to take good notes. She's been slacking off lately and Lord knows I need to do something to wake her up." Agatha sighed heavily snuggling herself deeper into his arms.

"And your premonition?"

"Dreadfully vague, something abought eastern philosophy and false death. So of course I ran her through the gauntlet of undead your people put up with, and an assortment of information on chi sorcerers and the higher level eastern martial artists. Not that there's a lot of difference between the two at the upper levels. I'm pretty sure, since it was false death and not undeath, she's going to be dealing with something more in your field then mine, but I'm sure she's going to be thinking the opposite of course."

"Are you sure she can handle it?"

"I consulted with Strange. He said the chaos level was a lot higher then normal around her, but that she was only in danger from emotional pain at moist."

"Moist?" Caine blinked in confusion.

"That's what he said." Agatha grinned, "Of course then he corrected himself and said he meant most, but you know what it's like trying to read the future of a chaos witch. Sometimes the slips are more telling then the readings themselves."

"Ahhh, so you suspect an 'eastern martial artist boyfriend thought dead' type of thing."

"Like teacher, like student." Agatha said beginning to undo the clasps on his Chinese's shirt.

"You don't think he's one of mine do you?" Caine replied working at the buttons on her dress.

Agatha paused. "Have you ever dealt with a chaos fount? Because with the level of interference Strange was reading it could scarcely be anything else."

Caine stopped what he was doing and shuddered. "I sure as hell hope not, because I have only trained one fount and he was the biggest pain in the ass it has ever been my misfortune to encounter."

Agatha frowned slightly. "Bad seed?"

Caine paused as he thought abought it. "Not really. He was actually extremely friendly and soaked up what I told him like it was water and he been dying of thirst. I've never had a more… adept student in all my life. It some ways he actually was a joy to teach, when he wasn't driving me nuts."

"So why was he a pain?"

"Well you know my style relies on very strict lessons to teach, not only the moves themselves but the unique viewpoint needed to advance beyond them and truly see."

"Yep, uptight and inscrutable in the extreme."

"I wouldn't put it quite that way, but for the most part you are correct. It was because of what I learned from him that I began questioning some of the tenets of my faith and journeyed beyond them."

"I thought you were suppose to be instructing him?"

"It is a poor teacher that does not learn from his student."

"There you go being inscrutable again." Her eyes twinkled as she grinned up at him.

"Let me give you an example…"

Ranma walked with Caine as he humbly asked to pass by a group of young men. They were clearly looking for someone to beat on to make themselves feel superior, so they could get up the nerve to rob the poor farmers who were selling the rice Caine and Ranma had come to buy.

Ranma had seen enough on the road to recognize the type. Genma had explained that you were basically allowed to rob people like that after they attacked you. After all if you had lost they would have taken your money, so basically it was an informal bet on who was better.

Ranma watched with a grin as the men surrounded master Caine and tried to berate him for being a 'chicken stealing bastard' and a beggar good for nothing but fertilizer. When He didn't gainsay them or offer any protest to their treatment of him they began to swell up their chests and strut around.

Swaggering and feeling like big shots they began to push at him and insult him further.

Ranma noticed that Caine still held his tongue and waited. Unlike Genma Caine had a certain standard to adhere to. He was a humble priest after all. Humble priests always wait until seriously attacked before acting.

One of the young punks swung at Caine and that's when he struck. Caine moved like the wind through the five of them. Several made the mistake of getting back up, but never more then once, as Caine seemed to look on that as them requesting a more through beating.

"And do you know what the little punk said when I asked him what he learned from that?"

Agatha starred into his eyes enthralled "No, what?"

"He said You can get them to attack easier by pretending to be meek then by pretending to be harmless. He pointed out that I could have crossed the road or walked around them, but that I had deliberately chosen to walk in between them to entice them to attack me, so I could deal with them directly without going against my oaths. While at the same time protecting the farmers."

Caine grumbled to himself for a minute before looking into Agatha's eyes and saying "The lesson was suppose to be 'Humility may lead to meanness, But vanity may lead to violence. Therefore it is better to be humble.' and instead he got that from it! And that's not even the worst part."

"There's more?"

"Yes. In the end I had to agree with him. He was correct. I was looking for a way to protect the farmers without breaking my vows to not fight except in self defense, but that's not even the worst part."

"It gets worse?"

"Much. He said I had done the right thing because I didn't make them attack me I just let them show their true nature and reacted the way I was suppose to. Then…" Caine shuddered a little, "He said he finally understood the lesson with the pebble."

Ranma: evolution: Gorilla Filler [Episode 101851]

by The Beast from the South-East

Ranma lay in bed considering all that had happened to him of late and how he should go about dealing with it; there were numerous problems that he would, some how, have to solve. The first was of course his mother who regardless of appearance and the deception she had played was still his mother whom he loved; the exact details of her life he hoped she would tell him once this was all over with but there lay the problem. He was being held captive, well as far as she knew, and from what little he had overheard had to work for old bucket-head for his release. He would have to remember to put him back in the infirmary when he next saw him, no one, but no one did that to his friends and certainly not his family, well mother anyway. He would have left already and found her if he a) knew where he was and b) knew where she was so till such time as he was able to figure out these facts he would have to remain here.

The plus side to this was of course the training opportunities that these people presented, there unique talents meant that he would be able to adapt and develop new ways of fighting while he waited. Payback was also not to be overlooked, Ranma was not the vengeful type but he was also not above getting his own back on those that he felt deserved whether in the from of a beating or in the more subtle but just as satisfying form of getting in the way of whatever they wanted to do.

Escaping was not a problem either he had already done it once and with the invisibility of the 'thieves cloak' and the destructive force of the 'demon god assault bomb' there was no way that he could see that would keep him here. This was disregarding the other little tricks that he had developed like his 'revised splitting cats hairs' which created a double of him even if it would be useless in a fight as only he or it could act fully at one time it certainly could be used to made a distraction and helped him from getting caught. He had used it that way earlier when he had awoken up naked in a rather compromising, and he would even admit enjoyable, position with that similarly naked girl. Regardless of the fact that the girl, Wanda wasn't it, had not attacked him or shouted at him he had taken no chances that what ever had kept them so calm would suddenly wear off when they broke apart.

Here he had to stop his thoughts to actually stop his figure rubbing together at the memory not to mention making sure that his 'little-friend' stayed asleep rather than do what it usually did in the mornings.

As she had been distracted with moving away from him he had shot right out of the bed leaving behind a duplicate image constructed from ki while cloaking himself using the umisenken(sp). It had been a tiring experience doing both and getting dressed while puppeteering the image into talking at the same time, add on the fact that he had been rather rudely awakened by the commotion outside the door before he had fully rested from his fight it was little wonder he had sought out another bed to sleep in.

The fact it was bucket-heads also contained a certain irony he found rather satisfying now that he had time and energy to think on it.

He wondered what Wanda thought when see had seen 'him' disappear like that when the sudden bang on the door had broken his concentration. She had made no move to hit his imago, so his fear had been unfounded on that regard, and until they were interrupted the calm had lasted between them something that was rare in his life and for some reason sensed was the same for her. But then again that could just be his imagination he knew practically nothing about her so really who was he to judge?

Wanda was another problem and, at the moment, the more immediate one. He was beginning to think that she was following him or something because every time that he went to sleep since he had come here she had got into bed with him, but more than likely it was one of those pointless coincidence that kept on turning up in his life. Her room had most likely got damaged by the fight and so she had gone to another empty one, this was the only one he knew about due to its normal occupant 'resting' else where it was likely she had had the same idea as he. However, regardless of how it had happened here they were again, at least it was not as bad as last time apart from both being naked their hands were more or less to themselves regardless of the fact that she was almost lying on top of him with her leg over both of his and her head rested against his chest.

Ranma realized that if this kept up, and knowing his luck it was going to and in the end be bad for him, he was going to have to get some clothes that were not so much ripped and dirtied that he was forgoing the wearing of them. With all the weird outfits that these guys were wearing he was sure that he would be able to come up with something he could wear. However these were thoughts for a different time, such as when he had gotten out of his current predicament. He was actually surprised that he was not panicing right now, as he would do normally, but again with this girl he was for some reason calm but he was not going to press his luck. Last time he pressed his luck it bit him so till he had what ever was going on sorted out he was not going to push it.

Ranma: evolution: The sleeper wakes! [Episode 102622]

by dogbertcarroll

Ranma yawned loudly, 'Yep. I'll just sneak out of here. I'll just slip out from under her and out the door. Any second now.'

Unfortunately he had spent more ki recently in a day then he usually did in the space of a week. He could feel the sheer exhaustion pull him down despite his efforts to stay awake. It was just so comfortable to lay there with her wrapped around him.

"Snnnkkkk" Ranma's soft snore echoed throughout the room.

Magneto yawned and scratched her right breast. She was feeling like she had just gone ten rounds with Wolverine. Which was actually preferable to how she had felt yesterday, when she had felt like she was in the process of going ten rounds with Wolverine.

She paused hefting her right breast in her hand. Something was different today and as soon as her brain came on line she was sure she would figure out what it was. In the meantime she was amazed at how firm yet squishy her breasts were.

"AAAARRRRRGGGGHHHHH!" A shocked and agonized scream echoed through the fortress shaking the walls and waking Wanda. Who once again found herself in a rather compromising position.

Wanda found herself perched astride Ranma with her arms pillowing her head on his chest. Trying to ignore a growing warmth from her neither regions and exactly what was prodding her in a certain area.

"Ranma?"

"slepwakleter" Ranma mumbled.

"Ranma, I really think you should wake up."

"sleepnowfoodlater"

Still incomprehensible, but slightly better.

Ranma sighed and shifted in his sleep wrapping his arms around her and pulling her tightly against him.

"Ummm. OK we have two things we really have to deal with now."

She was getting a little nervous. His shifting had had several effects, none of them conductive to her remaining a virgin and although she wasn't dead-set on remaining one by any means, getting de-virginized by someone who was still asleep was just a bit much to deal with.

"Ranma please wake up there's something I really need your help with."

"Wanna sleep."

"I know and I hate to wake you, but I really do need your help."

She was trying for her sweetest tone, because if she startled him he would probably jump and she really didn't want him to do that right now. Sudden movement on his part would be bad. Feeling herself grow warmer at the thought of him and sudden movements she had to admit to herself that bad was a really relative term.

"Kasumi?"

Ranma: evolution: A new technique unveiled! [Episode 103565]

by dogbertcarroll

"Who's Kasumi?"

Ranma's danger sense flared as he went from half asleep to full combat awareness in the space of a heartbeat. That voice still sounded in Kasumish tones but the undertones could have been used to shave dry ice.

There was only one way he was getting out of this alive. He would have to break out his most closely guarded technique. The one he saved for when he believed all was lost and death beckoned. Fortunately it was a technique he had developed and practiced until it was perfected. It wasn't something stupid like 'The Crouch of the Wild Tiger' either. Nope.

He had developed this technique after sticking his foot in his mouth one too many times around Kasumi. She was the most patient and understanding person he knew and the closest thing to a mother he had at the time, so making her frown would be something that would require seppuku to expunge.

Happosai had taken him aside and shown him where to learn what he needed to refine it to perfection. Timing and the correct words were the key. He had seen many try it and those that failed burned so spectacularly that you couldn't do anything but wince at the remains.

It was called 'The excuse of the guilty boyfriend! '.

You have to exclaim the truth as quickly as possible, without misspeaking a single syllable, while cramming in a compliment or two to the insulted female in tones that stated that you were simply speaking the truth as you knew it. Flowers and jewelry were also used if the offense was great enough.

Taking a single second to realize their position and the offense he committed, he briefly wished he'd had the foresight to steal the Hope Diamond.

Taking a deep breath he committed himself to the technique and began.

"Kasumi was the closest thing I had to a mother while living in Nerima. She was also the only person who would wake me without throwing water on me or assaulting me. I mistook you for her because of your gentle tones and kindness in waking me. I had no idea there existed a heart as kind as hers in a body of unsurpassed beauty such as yourself. I got you a pair of earrings, would you like to wear them now?"

Ranma's right hand lifted off her back briefly to disappear behind his head and reappear holding a pair of the most breathtaking earrings she had ever seen. They were red and blue gems swirled together like a pair of yin yang symbols with gold studs.

She melted sinking back down into his arms and slipping another inch downwards.

Ranma: evolution: Empathy and Earrings. [Episode 103581]

by dogbertcarroll

Ranma was aware of several things at this point. The first and most important of which was that Wanda was happy, very happy. The second thing he was aware of, and his awareness of it was growing by the second, was that he wasn't exactly unhappy himself.

In a manner of speaking.

"Umm. Wanda?"

"Yes Ranma?" She couldn't help but smile. He was just so cute when he was nervous and she was finding herself feeling more comfortable being in his arms and having him in her by the second.

"How did we end up like this?"

"I'm not sure. I figured dad wouldn't need his bed so I was going to use it, since mine was open to the elements after they tore the door off my room."

The pause lasted several seconds.

"Dad?" Ranma could tell he wasn't going to like the answer. Few things dealing with anyone's parents had ever been good in his experience.

"Unfortunately my Dad is Magneto."

"Oh" His voice was strangely flat.

"Are you going to hate me because of my father?"

Ranma winced at her tone. It spoke of pain and alienation that he was well acquainted with. He stroked her back reassuringly.

"I'd never hold who your parents are against you. It's your actions that matter, not your pop's. Just remember to give me the same break if you ever meet mine."

She felt like a great weight had been lifted off her chest. He didn't care who her father was. He didn't hold her responsible for what her idiot father had done to him. He was also massaging her back in a way that felt simply divine.

"Thank you." Her arms tightened around him as he kissed her forehead.

"There's nothing to thank me for. Only an idiot would hold someone responsible for something they didn't do." He brushed her hair back from her ears and put her new earrings in.

Wiping the nascent tears from the corners of her eyes he remarked "There we go. A beautiful gift for a beautiful girl."

She simply closed her eyes and sighed cuddling, into his chest.

"So why exactly did you wake me?"

"Umm."

Ranma: evolution: Always look for someone who can make you laugh. [Episode 103731]

by dogbertcarroll

"Well for one thing I heard someone scream and then when I tried to wake you… you sort of pulled me real close and something got inserted."

"Oh yeah, I kinda forgot."

"You forgot?" Wanda was stunned.

"Well, you were upset and that seemed more important."

Wanda gave him a quick squeeze. "You're getting a big kiss for that answer."

"I said the right thing?" Ranma was completely lost at this point.

"Well most boys only care abought one thing."

"Sparring?" Ranma asked hopefully.

Wanda began to giggle.

"Ahhh! No giggling!" Ranma was panting and sweat was beading on his forehead.

"What's wrong?" Wanda froze in place, all good humor gone as she worried abought his strange reaction.

"When you giggle… things move."

"And?"

"Well… I've never… and the feelings are so… How do I put this?" Ranma had relaxed a little, but still seemed really tense.

"Abought ready to 'Pop your cookies?', 'Shoot the Moon?', 'Drive Mrs. Daisy?', 'Score one in the hole?', 'Find Atlantis?'.

Ranma stopped laughing when he noticed Wanda starting to pant.

"Are you ok?"

"Yes, but I think I know what you mean now. I was just trying to relax you a little and take your mind off it, but… wow!"

"Yeah."

Everything got quiet as they calmed down a little.

"Umm. Let me start over."

Ranma: evolution: Explanations, at least in part. [Episode 103732]

by dogbertcarroll

"I heard a scream, so I tried to wake you up."

"Ya think it was that one chick who was actin' like a c.., like a caa…caaaat?"

Wanda looked at him curiously. 'What was that all abought?'

Ranma winced and looked a little ashamed. "I have a problem dealing with c... those animals. Doc said it was an extreme phobic reaction."

Wanda shivered and leaned into him, hugging him a little tighter. "I have the same problem with being locked up in dark places. Everyone's got something that sets them off."

Feeling a little embarrassed about having told her, but strangely comforted he tried to steer the conversation back on track. "So do you know who it sounded like?"

"I'd almost say my father, but it was a bit too high pitched."

"Oh." Ranma's face suddenly cleared of confusion and began to look a little guilty.

"What?" Wanda looked into his eyes, wondering why he was getting nervous.

"Uh, well…" Ranma met her eyes with a fair amount of guilt plain on his face.

"You turned my father into a woman?!"

Staring into the shocked eyes of the girl on top of him he had to admit 'Man she's good. It would've taken Nabiki at least five guesses to get that one right.'

"Please tell me it's temporary." Wanda begged.

"Yep. Give him abought a week and then splash him with some hot water and he'll be fine. Trust me I wouldn't wish having someone's sex changed permanently on anyone."

"Great. Now we only have one problem to deal with."

"OK, what is it?"

Wanda wiggled a little and Ranma found himself panting again.

"Gotcha." 'She understood my problem with… those animals, maybe she'll understand this too?'

"If I didn't know any better, I'd swear it was getting bigger."

Ranma's nervous attempts at whistling did not go unnoticed.

"It gets bigger?"

"Well…"

"How much bigger?"

"Feels like abought a quarter more left to grow."

"So that's what Sue meant!"

"What?"

"Not important. We have to do something about this quickly."

"Well, if we had a little bit of cold water I could fix this no problem."

Ranma: evolution: Awakening [Episode 109437]

by dogbertcarroll

Mystique picked up the Satome honor blade from where she had hidden it inside the false brickwork.

Magneto had been nice enough to return it once he had gotten what he wanted. He always was generous when he believed he had the upper hand.

It had taken a full 12 hours to reach Nerima from where she had been dropped off in England.

Magneto's latest plan had been even worse then his usual ones. He had wanted her to infiltrate a school in Gloucester that had been teaching mutants and humans openly and make it look like the mutants had been being mistreated and enslaved by the instructors.

His plan had called for a complete massacre of everyone at the school to raise tensions between the two races. The fact that it was just a grade school was unimportant to him.

He had been getting really desperate lately. When the war he had been anticipating had failed to appear he had tried to start it himself, only to find that there were too many level heads on both sides for his plans to work.

Memories of the death camps had been haunting his dreams with increasing frequency. It showed in his actions. He would probably murder half the world if it would get him what he wanted, a future where the camps weren't a possibility, at least not for his side.

She idly wondered what he would do when he realized that, if he hadn't already. It would explain his increasingly irrational behavior.

Slipping into her Nodoka persona she wrapped the sword in silk and shifted her form to match.

It was time to wake Hermes. Hopefully it wouldn't take too long. He had picked up a shifting curse so his memories should be close to the surface. God knows he had spent much too much time playing 'Genma' to be fully awake.

The danger of being a shifter, playing a role too long and falling 'asleep' allowing the created persona to run the show.

Just look at Happosai and Cologne if you had any doubts. They were prime examples of shifters asleep at the wheel. They retained just enough memories of their true selves to work with the others in raising and training the latest generation, but not enough to keep them from acting like the shortsighted characters they had decided to play.

Ranma: evolution: Surprises. [Episode 109572]

by dogbertcarroll

"I think we'll need more then just a little cold water to make that go down."

Ranma winced.

"All it takes is a small splash of cold water to make that go away."

Wanda tried to search his eyes, but he seemed to be looking anywhere but at her.

"Ranma? Is there something you want to tell me? If you don't want to I'll understand"

She could feel him tense under her. Whatever it was, it was big.

"I got a curse…" He paused and took a deep breath "and when people find out they treat me like a freak. Even if they pretend it's ok they tend to flinch or act strange around me, and eventually I'll end up in some strange situation and they'll decide I'm a freak and a pervert."

His voice kept getting lower and lower as he spoke till she had to strain to hear him.

"By the end even Kasumi began to assume I was guilty of anything I was accused of. I had to prove I was innocent and even then they would shrug it off as 'I wasn't guilty this time.'"

Wanda just held him tighter.

"Ranma? Have you ever ended up in anything remotely as bad as this situation?" She asked with a grin in her voice, already sure of his answer.

His voice came out sounding about a decade younger then his actual age. "Well…no."

"And have I blamed you or accused you of anything?"

Ranma cleared his throat and a little more strength entered his voice.

"No you haven't."

"So will you trust me, as I've trusted you?"

His arms encircled her as he buried his face in her hair. "I'll try."

A rather large clang echoed through the fortress and was completely ignored by the two.

"So all you need is a little water?" Wanda asked tentatively.

"Cold water." Came Ranma's voice, muffled by her hair.

Wanda sighed. It looked like she would have to share with him something about herself that she wasn't sure how he would react to.

"Ranma?"

He relaxed his grip and rested his head on the pillow again.

"Yeah?"

"How do you feel about mutants?"

"I don't have anything against them. My Mom's one and I may turn out to be one."

"How about witches?"

"As long as love potions and curses aren't involved they're ok I guess."

Some of the tension went out of her as she relaxed into his chest once more.

"Why?"

"Cause I'm both, and it tends to freak people out." The nervousness in her voice was clear.

Ranma's hands resumed stroking her back.

"That's nothing. My pop's a part time panda and I have 300 year old perverted martial arts master who keeps groping me. Trust me, being a witch and a mutant ain't got nothing on the people I lived with in terms of being out there. Compared to me you are downright normal."

Wanda blinked as she tried to comprehend her life being normal compared to someone else's.

"Have I mentioned that wildly improbable things happen around me?" She prodded.

Ranma grinned.

"Like say… a martial arts trained elephant breaks through a dozen walls carrying a small girl and a scroll, just in time to hand that scroll to a girl you've been engaged to against your will, which gets her kidnapped by a prince from a magic kingdom seconds later in a huge boat flying around with hot air balloons, and then you have to round up a dozen people who all want to kill or marry you and each other, all the while it turns out not really to be needed, cause her cooking has almost killed said prince?"

Wanda smiled and countered with;

"How about you go to see a new movie with a new friend and have a great time, but when you get home two of your roommates are having a fight with what resembles a giant living jello mold. You and your friend both get covered in gunk from both sides and have to jump into the shower and use soap and water to get the stuff off before it hardens, so while you are both standing there naked and covered in soap trying to get this crap off, you are talking abought the lead actor and what a long tongue he has when the door disintegrates and your least favorite roommate is standing there and decides he's your one true love? Followed of course by discovering your new friend is a mutant from a rival group who now believes you set her up and the creepy guy at the door starts buying samurai gear and chasing you around spouting the worst poetry you have ever heard?"

Ranma began to laugh only to stop himself when Wanda let out a small moan.

"Maybe we better get the cold water before talking some more?"

Wanda just smirked .

"I don't know. For some reason I have this incredible urge to start telling jokes."

Ranma gave her the puppydog eyes treatment and she crumbled.

"Sigh. OK, there's a water pipe above us. I just have to blast a small hole in it and we will have our cold water."

Ranma examined the ceiling.

"The blue one?"

"That's the one."

Ranma raised a hand and pointed it at the ceiling.

Wanda just watched in surprise as Ranma's hand began to glow. A sudden warmth enveloped her as a huge ball of blue fire flew from his hand to smash into the ceiling.

As the pipe (and parts of the surrounding ceiling) evaporated, gallons of water poured down on to the bed soaking them both and activating his curse, before safety interlocks shut the water flow off.

Wanda was rather surprised to find herself buried face down in a very impressive expanse of cleavage, it almost succeeded in distracting her from the sudden feeling of emptiness.

She heard a slight tremble in Ranma's voice as s/he? spoke. "Wanda?"

"Mrrmmpp?"

"Ummm."

Wanda sat up. "No fair! They're bigger then mine!"

Ranma just stared at her with a hint of trepidation in her eyes. "You're not mad?"

Wanda just looked at her, a little stunned at the transformation and a lot at Ranma's reaction. "For what?"

"Cause I turn into a girl or cause my breasts are bigger?" Ranma winced and closed her eyes waiting for the inevitable blow that always followed her blurting out a similar comment many times before.

"Why are you cringing?"

"You're not going to hit me?"

"Why would I hit you?" Shock was plain in Wanda's voice.

"Cause of what I said?"

"That's no reason to hit you." Wanda's voice was firm on that point.

"Really?" Ranma uncurled a little, hope in her eyes.

Wanda stretched out an arm and pulled the shorter girl into a hug.

"Really. Besides bigger doesn't mean better. Just ask yourself this. Which of these two pair do you like better?"

Wanda's smile threatened to split her face as she saw Ranma freeze up staring at her breasts. As an experiment she let her go and swayed gently from side to side, giggling as Ranma's head followed as if tied to them.

Her voice broke Ranma out of his trance. "I think that answers that question, don't you Ranma?"

"Ranko."

"What?"

"Ranko. I go by Ranko when I'm a girl."

"So never right?"

"Huh?"

"Sorry Ranma, but even in that body you're still a guy to me." She paused and tried to explain what she meant. "I mean sure you're body may look like a girl's body… but when I look in your eyes I just don't see a girl, but I'll call you Ranko cause you asked ok?"

The starry eyed look that Ran…ko directed at her made her more then a little nervous.

"Ran…ooommmppp!"

Finding herself in a bone crushing hug with Ranko kissing her she mentally shrugged and began returning it with interest. She did say she owed him a kiss anyway, right?

The thud of a body hitting the floor behind them surprised the both of them as they slowly released their hold on each other.

Looking down at the person lying unconscious on the floor Wanda ventured a soft "Dad?"

Ranma: evolution: Misconceptions [Episode 109915]

by dogbertcarroll

The Acolytes gathered around Sabertooth's downed form. The dent in the wall and the amount of steel wrapped around him spoke for itself.

Still, Gambit knew that Sabertooth was sometimes a little slow when it came to matters of tact.

"Mon ami… perhaps 'Nice Rack' wasn't exactly the best thing to say, eh?

"I think comrade Sabertooth could use some bed rest."

"You could at least wait until he's conscious anyway."

Colossus's skin took on a silvery sheen as he began to unwrap the hospital bed from their teammate.

"What do you think did that to our fearless leader anyway?"

Gambit shrugged "John, I t'ink we had best be getting wit' the major juju if we wanna avoid a similar fate. This stinks of magic and not a type I wanna deal wit'. "

Ranma grinned unnoticed as he followed them, cloaked in the Umisenken.

Well… almost unnoticed.

Pyro's eyes widen slightly as he watched a trail of wet footprints walk towards them.

"So what would this magic look like?" He asked with a tremble in his voice as he played with his lighter nervously.

"Don' know. If I did you can bet Gambit would be settin' up protections already."

Pyro flicked his Zippo open and suddenly the world was made of flame.

Wanda stared at her father. She still couldn't believe Ranma had been able to do that to him.

The only reason she wasn't laughing like crazy was because when Ranma has rushed off she had suddenly remembered he was dead.

Apparently Name Rank was shorthand among the ectoplasmic community for powerful beyond the bounds of sanity.

He had a physical presence (Boy did he!) when he wanted one and enough power to change someone's sex as a prank. While she could tweak local probabilities he could simply twist reality. Just being around him had filled her with energy.

Holding up a hand she let her power bubble to the surface. Blue flames danced along her fingers.

'As easy as breathing. It should take hours to concentrate and draw this much power.'

When he was in the same room as her, it was literally impossible for her to think of him as dead. The sheer amount of life he exuded just shoved the possibility from her mind.

The fear of cats was a dead giveaway though. Cat's were the guiding spirits for the dead in Egyptian mythology. For a spirit hanging onto this plane cats would be terrifying.

He wasn't an evil spirit thankfully. Everything he did was just to pass the time until he could see his mother again.

His actions proved it if nothing else did, he had checked to make sure her 'Mom' was ok before he had rushed off, saying he didn't realize it was so late and he should have been sparring with the Acolytes hours ago.

So the wave of flame that washed down the hall shortly thereafter came as no surprise.

Ranma: evolution: Out of the frying pan... [Episode 110448]

by dogbertcarroll

Gambit and Colossus flinched back from the wall of flame that had suddenly flared up behind them.

Pyro had been nervous and twitchy, cluing the two in that something was going on, but they were unprepared for such an extreme reaction. As one they turned to see exactly what had set him off.

Seeing a hall that suddenly looked like it was a gateway to hell made them nervous. Watching a figure wreathed in flames approach as if it was nothing more then a small annoyance… pants would need to be changed.

Colossus quickly tossed Sabertooth's unconscious body into the infirmary and slammed the door shut, while Gambit threw a trio of charged playing cards at the apparition. The cards flared up and fizzed out as the flames consumed them far short of their goal.

Gambit squinted as he stared into the inferno. "Concentrate all your flames on 'im. Doan' waste none on the furniture."

Pyro nodded slightly and narrowed his focus, drawing all the heat in the hall into a living column of flame.

Colossus shielded his eyes from the glare. Remmy had managed to pull a pair of sunglasses out of somewhere and Pyro was too focused on what he was doing to even notice it, but the steel in the hallway surrounding the pillar was beginning to glow.

"I think stopping now would be good. Hall is melting. Surely enemy has melted too."

Pyro released his hold on the flames, staggered and would have fallen had Gambit not grabbed him. He looked exhausted. Sweat was dripping from his forehead and his breath was coming out in short pants.

"Did I get him?"

All eyes turned to the hole burned through the steel plated floor of the hall. The edges were still glowing white hot and the tink of cooling metal could be heard echoing throughout the slagged hall.

Ranma stared up at the hole.

He knew his ability to resist heat was high. The training he had gotten from Master Caine allowed him to ignore hot coals. The Phoenix Pill he had gotten from Cologne had upped his resistance even further, (The fight with Saffron probably would have gone quite differently if not for Caine and Cologne.) and after having been bathed in the flames of a dying phoenix he'd suspected it had risen even higher.

This however… was a surprise.

Then he noticed he was feeling a bit of a draft.

Looking at himself he could easily see the reason why.

"Did I get him?"

The Acolyte's began to relax. It looked like whatever it had been Pyro had fried it. Nothing could have survived that! Pyro had nearly exhausted himself exerting his power to the limits. The conflagration he had created had been a shocker, even to him.

The naked male that leapt from the hole was a rather unpleasant surprise.

"That's it. No more 'Mister Nice Ghost'. You have destroyed the last change of clothes I had with me and you are going to pay!"

Magneto awoke with a start. It took a second for her brain to reboot.

'Girlish screams… Girls… Wanda kissing another girl…'

*Thump*

Wanda sighed as she watched her father pass out again.

'I have no idea how I'm going to explain this to him. Maybe I can pass Ranma off as my lesbian lover?'

An evil grin grew on her face as she imagined his reaction.

Ranma just stood there scratching the back of his head.

Of all the possible reactions he had anticipated 'Scream-like-a-little-girl and then run-like-your-ass-was-on-fire' wasn't one of them.

'I wonder what scared them?'

Ranma: evolution: Ego rising [Episode 110774]

by dogbertcarroll

Ranma did a quick run through in his mind of which Acolyte was the closest in size to him.

The firebug was too skinny and both the metal man and the guy with the fangs were much too big. The guy who kept throwing explosive cards was probably the best match. His taste in clothes was a bit bizarre, but at least he wouldn't have to raid Magneto's closet. Being forced to run around with a bucket on his head would really suck.

Now his only worry was how to find the card guy's room.

Magneto came awake with a sneeze, glancing around as she did a quick inventory.

'Daughter is here and dressed. Check.'

'No other red headed females are present. Check.'

'Stand down panic attack.'

Sitting up slowly, she wondered if being turned into a woman could have affected her mind. Maybe she had imagined the whole thing?

Slowly she examined her room in greater detail.

Her bed was soaked, as was her daughter who had an expression that all men (even those that were currently female) dreaded. Her expression said 'we have to talk'.

Suppressing a shudder, as it was unbecoming the future ruler of all mutantkind, Magneto braced herself for whatever her daughter had to tell her.

"Mom, we need to talk."

Metal plates ripped themselves free from the walls and floor, as Magneto's subconscious took control of her powers, surrounding her in a soundproof (and probably bombproof) cocoon.

Wanda couldn't contain her laughter.

'This is going to be fun!'

Ranma slipped into the Umisenken, checking to make sure he wasn't leaving a trail of footprints behind him again.

Hindsight was a wonderful thing.

It was clear that, once again, he had let his ego run away with him. His old man had even pointed out to him long ago that the flaw in the 'Thief's Cloak' was that it didn't mask sound, smell, or interaction with the environment.

He had shown Pops that using the 'Feather Step' technique he'd learned from Caine covered both sound and most interaction with the environment. Forgetting that he was covered in water was his own fault. Once more his enormous ego had convinced him that he was invulnerable and that he didn't need to take any precautions.

He had to admit it did work well in cementing their belief that he was dead. Someone drowned and eaten by sharks would naturally show up dripping water. He'd just be sure to leave out any mention of it being an accident when he told the story to anyone else.

'I wonder if Wanda would know which room Card guy sleeps in?'

Ranma glided down the hallway, oblivious to the still searing temperatures of the steel he was treading upon.

Wanda was contemplating turning the big steel egg, which her 'mom' had wrapped herself up in, into a big pile of rust when Ranma's voice sounded from the doorway.

"Wanda? Would you happen to know where I can find the card throwing guy's room?"

Ranma: evolution: A little Voodoo... [Episode 111321]

by dogbertcarroll

Colossus set an exhausted Pyro on Gambit's bed, as Gambit righted his dresser and began scrambling through it's contents.

Clothes and odds & ends went flying as he searched for the few items he had that might actually help. Gambit let out a sigh of relief as his hand touched an old leather bound black book.

"Best hope ole Gambit remembers 'ow ta do this right. 'elp me clear the floor."

Colossus and Gambit tossed aside clothes and furniture, that had scattered across the floor in the battle the day before, until only bare steel met their gaze.

Gambit sped through the book, running his finger down each page, while muttering something about needing an index. Pausing at one page he quickly committed it to memory.

Reaching under his bed he pulled out a wineskin and a hip flask. Flipping over his nightstand reveled the bottom to have been carved into a hidden shrine of sorts.

"If you do not practice, then why do you have so many of the…" Colossus trailed off unsure of exactly what to call them.

"Tools o' the trade?" At Colossus's uncertain nod he continued, "Well Mon ami, Gambit believe you can never be too prepared. My grandam, may she rest, told Gambit he would run across many strange t'ings and a little working knowledge o' voodoo would 'elp 'im through 'em. So while ole Gambit ain't exactly top shelf, 'e may be able to clear off some minor spooks and at least slow down t'is 'aunt."

Gambit poured some sort of fragrant herb into the altar's bowl along with some of the liquid from the flask before continuing, "She 'ad a bit o' the sight, so I always followed her advice. Sides she would 'ave 'ad my 'ide tanned and stretched if'n I didn't"

Colossus stood there blinking for a moment and wonder if he should have Gambit repeat that in English.

Gambit crossed himself nervously before uncapping the wineskin and pouring a grayish powder on the floor in a spiraling pattern near the doorway, chanting all the while and sprinkling some liquid in the air from a hip flask.

He tossed a lightly charged match onto the alter and watched as it set the offering aflame with no small amount of satisfaction. He hadn't lost touch with the small gift he had. The warding had been successful.

Taking a slug from the flask, it was traditional, he couldn't help but grin.

'If this don't stop it, nothing will!'

Wanda had just finished explaining her latest idea for driving her father insane, much to Ranma's amusement, and given him directions to Gambit's room, when she felt a fairly strong ward snap into place.

"Ranma?"

*silence*

'Guess he already left. That's the problem with dating a guy that can turn immaterial, you never know where they are when they decide to stay invisible..'

Mentally shrugging she decided it really wasn't anything to worry about. Ranma had enough power to walk through most wards without a problem and could probably break through a major one given enough time. As a spirit he packed some heavy horsepower.

*sigh*

She quickly shook off the melancholy that followed that thought.

"Well 'Mom', it looks like it's time to turn even more of your hair white or failing that see if we can make some fall out!"

Ranma quietly chuckled to himself, still cloaked in the Umisenken. Wanda was as sneaky as Nabiki and defiantely sexier… nicer, Much nicer... and in all the right places too!

Following her directions he found Gambit's room easily.

The Neon sigh above the steel door reading 'Gambit's Pleasure Den: Where it's always Mardi Gra!' was kind of a hint.

'These guys really are idiots.'

Ranma: evolution: Plans [Episode 114108]

by dogbertcarroll

Ranma paused with his hand held up to knock. He knew that three of the Acolytes were in there, because he could feel the fear in their auras right through the door, so he didn't need to hunt around for them.

The prayers in two different languages, which could be heard from under the door, were also a slight clue.

They had destroyed his clothes and Chinese silk clothes in the style and size he wore weren't cheap.

A little more in the way of payback was in order, besides he wanted to split them up so he could concentrate on each one for a little practice and it would be much easier to do if he had them running scared.

Not to mention it'd be hard to snag some clothes with them in the way.

Grinning evilly as an idea hit him, Ranma went off to fetch some supplies.

Wanda hummed merrily to herself, as she cast hex sphere after hex sphere on her 'Mom's' metal womb, while sitting on Magneto's desk.

Each sphere chipped away slowly at the rusty construct protecting Magneto from her daughter's latest plan to drive the poor would be world conqueror insane.

Wanda didn't mind the amount of time it was taking. She had power to burn right now and some practice was definitely in order. About two third of her attacks were successful, in that they did what she meant them to do (convert steel into rust) rather then just fizzing out or producing some random effect. Bit's of melted and iced over sections of metal were a testament to how much she needed to improve.

Besides she could think of much worse things to do to pass the time them throw attacks at her 'Mom'.

At least Agatha would be pleased that she was doing her homework. She had been lecturing her a lot about using her mutant ability and not relying solely on her magical skills and the importance of balance between the two skills.

Was it her fault that her mutant ability just happened to magnify her ability to handle magic? Casting spells well beyond her apparent skill level was a snap with the way she channeled mana. Control however….

Watching her latest hex sphere turn rust back into steel she decided that Agatha may just have a point.

Ranma closed the door to the medical bay with a grin.

He had tucked Sabertooth into one of the beds (He wasn't completely heartless after all), after hitting a couple of pressure points on him that would keep him out for the next 12 hours or so.

He'd have to think of doing something 'special' to him later. There were several things he thought would be funny as hell, unfortunately he would need some clothes first or he would have done them already.

He resisted the urge to whistle as he strolled down the hall with a bucket at his side.

He had everything he needed to get the supplies he required to really throw a scare into the Acolytes.

Retracing his steps he easily found the cell he had woken up in.

Emma woke up and stretched out.

*wham*

Unfortunately for her she had woken up on top of a bookcase in the library.

Fortunately she was only six feet from the floor.

Unfortunately the floor was a thin layer of carpet over steel plating.

It looked like she would be sleeping for a little bit longer.

"Are you sure, Comrade Gambit, that 'ward' will keep out ïðèâèäåíèå?"

Gambit took a swig from his hip flask. "Eh?"

"Spirit."

Gambit shrugged. "Gambit t'inks it be one powerful spirit if'n it can get past t'at ward."

"Did you not say spirit would need be powerful to change people?"

Gambit upended his flask, finishing it off, before replying, "Vodkas' under the bed."

Colossus was about to ask again before realizing he had gotten his answer and reached under the bed.

Ranma: evolution: This title is just seven words long. [Episode 115784]

by dogbertcarroll

Ranma stood outside Gambit's door with an evil grin adorning her face. It had taken longer then she had thought it would to get everything she needed, but if all went well it would be worth the extra time and effort, besides who was he to turn down a free lunch?

'Wish I could have found some tuna though'

Water dripped from her seaweed adorned figure and the empty bucket she held in her right hand.

Ranma giggled evilly.

Colossus took a swig from the bottle before passing it back to Gambit, his eyes glued to the foot of the door, where he could see a small puddle of water collecting.

"Is backdoor to room?"

Gambit took another swig, already half sloshed from stress and Vodka.

"Eh?"

"Is another way out of room, da?"

Colossus's eyes remained fixed on the bottom of the door as he stood up, watching a small stream of water flow around the edges of Gambit's design on the floor.

"Nope."

Even as unsteady on his feet as he was Colossus's eyes never moved.

An evil high pitched giggle could just barely be heard and was drowned out by a loud clang that resounded through the room.

Colossus jumped nervously, staring at the large white teeth sticking through the steel door in an oval pattern, like a rather large something had just bitten into the door.

"Where would friend Gambit like one?"

Gambit's answer was lost in the sounds of tearing metal, as Ranma used brute strength to twist the door off its hinges and throw it across the hall.

Gambit stumbled to his feet starring at the doorway. The hallway in front of his room was covered in water and seaweed, with a bare section in the shape of a pair of feet pointed at him.

Ranma grinned unseen, hidden in the Umisenken. She had hoped that the sea water she had doused herself with would have outlined her form, like it had that creature in that Schwarzenegger flick, but from the direction of their gazes she could tell it hadn't.

Something seemed to be working however as both Gambit and Colossus, wavering unsteadily on their feet, had turned pale and were starring at her feet.

Shrugging to herself, Ranma stepped forward…

Emma woke up stiff and sore on the floor of the library.

Shaking her head groggily she swore to herself she would give up drinking… again. She hadn't felt this bad since that time she had attempted to seduce Rogue, without knowing what her powers were.

She had just sat up when the wall in front of her exploded.

Seconds later she found herself unconscious… again.

Or rather she didn't, because it's damn hard to find anything when you are unconscious.

"Did floor in library feel bumpy to you?"

"Shut up an' run!"

Ranma struggled to move. Blue fire outlined his form as he strained, with one foot raised, against whatever was holding him in place.

He had just stepped into the room, well halfway anyway, when some force had grabbed him. The water on his body had been converted to steam almost instantly. The seaweed had dried and caught fire seconds later. It wasn't painful, but it was annoying.

Ranma grimaced as he pushed his foot down.

The things he went through for a decent pair of pants.

Ranma: evolution: Callin' In Sick [Episode 116179]

by dogbertcarroll

The force restraining Ranma popped like a soap bubble, as his foot made contact with the pattern, overbalancing him and sending him face first into the floor.

*WHAM*

"Ouch."

Ranma pried his face out of the floor and brushed off the grey powder that covered his body.

Whatever Gambit had drawn on the floor was just one big grey smear now, which was a shame because Ranma was kind of curious about what it had been. It hadn't worked for long, but it had held him in place and set his seaweed on fire.

Ranma glanced around the room.

The place was in horrible condition. Clothes were lying everywhere, furniture was overturned, the floor had grey powder all over it, the door had been ripped off and a new doorway added to the back wall.

'I may have overdone things again. Man, these guys are jumpy.'

Ignoring a sleeping Pyro, Ranma started shopping.

Gambit and Colossus had gotten separated rather quickly. Probably because Colossus had skipped opening doors and had simply ran through them, often mistaking sections of hallway as doors. He was currently hiding under a jeep in the garage. None of the jeeps wheels were in contact with the floor.

Gambit had simply headed for the elevators and was currently in the sub-basement hiding in a storage room. It had very little in the way of defensive measures against intruders, but it did have all the alcohol supplies not already in his room. The way he figured it, if he was going to meet his end he'd be damned if he was going to do so sober.

Emma groaned as consciousness returned. She felt like she had been run over by a semi. Her head hurt, her body ached and her left arm felt like hell. She didn't know what was going on anymore. Her last memory was of trying to scan for some boy Sabertooth said was dead, then a brief memory of falling and… an explosion?

"Are you OK Ms.?"

Holding her arm and hissing in pain she turned and met the bluest eyes she had ever seen and could only come up with one response.

"Mroorw?"

Ranma: evolution: Neko-Kin. [Episode 116347]

by dogbertcarroll

"Mroorw?"

Ranma blinked.

'OK… That was different.'

Ranma stepped through the hole in the wall, approaching carefully lest she turn out to be one of the more violent residents of this nuthouse. She certainly dressed the part.

'Good looking blond wearing something that Kodachi probably wears to bed, cept' it'd probably be black.' Ranma thought to himself, as he took in what she was wearing.

"Ms.? Do you need help?"

Emma stepped forward on all fours, only to crumble whimpering when her left front 'leg' gave out under her.

Ranma sped forward, catching her before her shoulder could hit the floor. Cradling her in his arms nervously, he asked "You OK?"

Semi-naked girls were usually bad news in his experience and he was already bracing himself for some kind of psychotic behavior that would give him an excuse to escape, before she demanded he do something for her, like take her on a date or marry her.

Her entire demeanor and positioning screamed 'CAT!' to his senses. It was something about the way she had moved and the noises she made. You couldn't point out any particular feature or mannerism as the defining trait, but taken as a whole it was undeniable.

Normally just being around a cat meant it was a good time for Ranma to scream and run through a couple of walls like the metallic Russian did earlier, however despite the cat-like traits she definitely wasn't a cat and… she was injured.

Her answering whimper with accompanying soulful eyes pretty much melted any resistance he would have put up anyway. He carefully began to examine her trying to mimic 's bedside manner.

One side effect of the Neko-ken was an inability to leave an injured feline without helping it. It was the only time his fear of cats abated. He'd managed to hide that particular quirk from everyone, including Genma. The last thing he wanted was for his 'Pops' to get the idea that maiming cats and tossing them at him would help.

The only time Genma had witnessed it was while passing through Hong Kong. They had come upon a drunk kicking a bag full of felines. He'd booted it right into Ranma's face.

'There was so much blood…'

Fortunately Genma has been drunk with the success of Ranma's training and about four bottles of sake, so much of what had occurred he had missed completely.

Ranma had spent nearly two weeks nursing the kittens back to health and faking being in the Neko-ken to cover for his lack of fear. He'd thought he was cured of the fear for good until incidents in Nerima had proven otherwise.

'Just thinking about it…'

Ranma shook himself out of his momentary daze and gently cradled her to himself as he stood, murmuring all the nonsense little phrases people use to calm someone who's injured.

While speeding down the hall, at the fastest speed he could go without jostling her, he couldn't help but think that something about her was familiar. It was almost like he had met her before…

Ranma: evolution: Stroking the Pus err... cat! [Episode 120346]

by dogbertcarroll

Ranma carefully set the strangely dressed girl on one of the hospital beds, while muttering meaningless little phrases to keep her calm.

"That's a good kitty. We'll have you fixed up in no time."

Scratching her behind the ear earned him a soothing purr, as he convinced her to relax on the bed. Keeping his voice soft and his touch light he was able to stroke several of her drowsyness points without a problem.

Examining her arm he was pleasantly surprised to find out it wasn't broken, just severely bruised. Hitting a couple of points on her body, that she would surely have complained about had she been awake, he managed to increase the blood flow in her body and unblock her chi paths. Wrapping her arm in an ace bandage finished the job.

'She may be a bit more emotional for a while, but she should be fine in a day or two.'

He still remembered Cologne teaching him this series of pressure points, using Shampoo as the practice dummy. It was rather hard to forget. For several days Shampoo had alternated between acting like herself and Akane. Glomp and snuggle one minute then a Bonbori to the head the next.

Ranma had adapted the same technique he used on Kasumi, when she had her monthly 'visitor', to dealing with the situation. Agree with everything she says, feed her chocolate, and rub her feet.

It was amazing how well that technique worked.

Smiling to himself he turned and found himself facing another bed, containing a sleeping Sabertooth from where he had put him to sleep earlier.

'Almost forgot.'

Ranma grinned evilly.

He had meant to do this earlier, but having no clothes made accessing his hidden weapons skill a lot more difficult.

'Mousse could do it naked, no sweat, but then he has over a decade experience with the technique. Still can't believe he pulled out an entire car that one time.'

Ranma stopped and examined the set of clothes he had 'borrowed' from Gambit in a mirror on the wall of the medical bay.

Black pants with the seams reinforced and modified, to allow for a lot greater range of motion then one would expect from skin tight jeans. A simple black shirt that looked like cotton, but obviously wasn't. Cotton wasn't as strong as whatever this was. The tiny metal implements hidden in the seams had almost escaped his examination. A quick glance had confirmed they were a very nice lockpick set. The black leather duster wasn't something to sneeze at either. It was made from some type of lizard and had tons of little pockets inside. Most were occupied by decks of cards and strangely enough, a rulebook with over 2000 solitaire games listed. The boots completed his little ensemble. Black (like everything else he had chosen) leather made of some lizard or other, with surprisingly thin soles and thin steel sections reinforcing the joints and heel.

"Damn, I look good!" He grinned at his reflection in the mirror, "I'm going to have to do something nice for Gambit."

'Maybe some additional staff techniques?'

Mentally forcing himself back on track, he reached into his pockets and pulled out a handful of items.

'Powdered Spring Packet, Waterproof Soap, Blue Dye, Shampoo 110, needle and thread. That should be everything.'

Ranma: evolution: Unsettling Revelations [Episode 120979]

by dogbertcarroll

"Mom?" Wanda asked gently, trying desperately not to giggle.

"Y-y-yes dear?" Magneto answered, through the rather large hole her daughter had created in her cocoon.

"I was going to tell you this last year, but I decided you weren't mature enough to know yet, however I think you're old enough to know now."

"W-what would that be dear?" Magneto braced herself for an uncomfortable revelation about her daughter's sex life.

There was a brief moment of silence before Wanda answered.

"I'm adopted."

"What?! When did this happen? Why didn't you tell me?" Shock was apparent in Magneto's voice.

"I didn't think you were adult enough to handle it, but lately you've been showing signs of maturity so I thought it best I told you."

"I-I-I…."

Patting the metal egg gently Wanda asked, "Would you like a little time alone to deal with it?"

Regaining control over her vocal cords with an effort Magneto replied, "Yes… I think that's best."

Wanda nodded and gave the egg one last pat, "I'll be available if you want to talk later Mom."

Walking out of Magneto's room, she closed the door and began sprinting down the hall desperately trying to hold in her laughter till she was out of hearing range.

Bumping into Ranma, coming out of the medical bay, she lost it and started laughing.

Ranma stopped wiping his hands on a paper towel, as Wanda clung to him.

"What's so funny?"

"I just … convinced … my 'mom' … that I was … adopted!" Panting and wiping her eyes Wanda caught her breath.

Ranma grinned, "That was a good one, but I've got a better one."

"What?"

"Check out the bed in there."

Wanda opened the door and peeked in. "You broke The White Queen's arm?" She asked, a bit upset.

"Nah, I fixed it. The Tin Man stepped on her going through a wall. Check out the other bed."

"I don't see anything."

Ranma smirked, "Get real close, but don't wake him."

Wanda tiptoed into the medical bay, only to return a moment later stunned. "Who?"

"Sabertooth."

Color returned to her face, along with a cheek splitting grin. "Couldn't have happened to a more deserving guy."

Ranma snickered, "Just like ole' Bucket Head, he'll return physically to normal in about a week. The dye takes a couple of weeks to wear off tho' and the mental effects may take months."

"Mental effects?"

"A minor adjustment to his vocabulary."

"You mean?"

"Yep. Rather fitting isn't it?"

Wanda just laughed.

Ranma tucked the blue stained paper towel into a pocket and posed with his hands on his hips. "Who's the man?"

Wanda wrapped her arms around him, "That would be you, for a couple of hours more at least. We need you female and dressed appropriately for dinner for the next phase."

Ranma smiled as he held her close, "I also have a little surprise involving the underdressed chick and your mom if all goes well."

"Really? What?"

"It's a surprise."

Wanda smiled and snuggled deeper into his arms, "Busy?"

Ranma shrugged off his rapidly fading fear of girls, "I got time."

"Good, I want to give you the tour."

Releasing him, she grabbed his hand and led him off down the hall.

Magneto stopped banging her head on her desk and exclaimed, "She can't be adopted! I did the blood tests myself!"

Rubbing her temples, she wondered if there was any Midol in the med bay.

Ranma: evolution: Episode XVIIVXY: A promise of no Jar-Jar! [Episode 121146]

by dogbertcarroll

"And here is the Motor Pool." Wanda gestured to the garage; a large storage bay filled with a variety of vehicles.

Ranma nodded. "Japanese cars are a lot smaller. Some of the ones in here look like they'd hurt if they hit you."

"Hit you?" Wanda tilted her head to the side and gave Ranma a quick once over, to see if he had suddenly gained Colossus size and stature in the last few minutes.

Ranma grinned. "The cars in Japan are a lot smaller and lighter then the ones here and we martial artists tend to play in the streets a lot. The last time I got injured from a vehicle was when me and Ryoga were sparring and I met the 915 from Juuban. I'm not really sure if that counts tho' cause the bus was parked. Actually come to think of it your pop hit me with a dump truck and that was like getting hit by Ryoga, but I don't really consider a dump truck a vehicle, it's more along the lines of construction equipment."

"How tough are you?"

"Not quite as tough as the metal guy. He takes a hit better then Ryoga. He might actually be a bit stronger then him too. I'm not really sure. I make it a habit not to stand around and let people hit me to gauge their strength."

"The metal guy is called Colossus. His real name's Peter. He's a nice guy, but Bucket Head," She snickered a bit "saved a couple of members of his family and keeps them safe. So he owes Dad for saving his family and they're basically hostages to his good behavior."

Ranma winced. "I know how that feels. Remind me to give your Mom a wedgie later."

"Will do. So who's Ryoga?"

"Well back in Nerima…"

Magneto rubbed her temples, as she absently reformed debris into steel plates and piping repairing her room. 'I wonder if we have any Midol in the med bay.'

With a wave of her hand she flipped her bed on it's side and watched the water logged mattress and bedding drain onto the floor. Drying may have been an option, but after what she had seen his daughter up to in her bed burning was definitely the way to go.

'I'll put Pyro on it and have Colossus replace the bedding.'

Feeling a bit more in control with her quarters in order and a plan of action in mind Magneto strode out of her quarters and into the slightly melted hall.

"What the hell's been going on?"

Grumbling to herself, Magneto began repairs on the hall.

Later that evening…

Gambit had relaxed pretty quickly as the spirit had failed to appear and wreak havoc upon him. Well… that and the fifth of Jack Daniels he'd downed while waiting had unwound him quite a bit. So much so in fact that he'd fallen asleep and didn't awake until the PA had come on announcing dinner.

Yawning, he wiped his eyes and headed for the dining room. A bit of grub was definitely in order. The view that awaited him in the dining room was a bit of a shock tho'.

It wasn't the fact that Magneto was still female (with an impressive rack) or the White Queen curled up in her lap feeding her, although she did look a bit nervous at the attention.

It wasn't the way Wanda and some girl were curled up similarly themselves. Wanda looked quite a bit happier at her situation them Magneto did.

It was the small figure on the table.

It was the small blue figure on the table.

"What the smurf are you starring at you smurfing idiot?"

It was the small blue figure on the table that looked like it was the life size model for the new 'Feral Smurf' doll, complete with standard white smurf outfit.

Ranma:: A nice quiet dinner… [Episode 140743]

by dogbertcarroll

Pyro's mind was considering taking a nice long vacation, preferably someplace warm and quiet.

Seeing Magneto turned into a woman had been a bit of a shock, but her subsequent actions had proven that he was still her… err something like that.

The ghost chasing them had scared the hell out of him, even more so when it had shrugged off his powers like they were nothing more then a minor irritant.

Other things were far more nerve racking however.

The Ice Bitch herself, Emma Frost, had curled up in Magneto's lap and responded tearfully if he/she was anything, but affectionate to her. A slightly neutral tone would earn a tearful glance and a sniffle from the mutant psionicist and if Magneto's wince was any indication, the feedback was not pleasant. It had taken a bare five minutes before the leader of the Acolytes was speaking in honeyed tones and behaving sickeningly cute.

"Would you like some more rice, Sweetie?" Magneto offered the scantily clad woman perched in his lap, a bit nervously.

"I'd love some, Honey!" Emma replied snuggling into Magneto's impressive chest with a contended smile on her face.

Whether or not he was mentally 'all there', Pyro was doing his level best to pretend everything was business as usual.

Colossus, strangely enough, was completely relaxed and working on his seventh helping of pressed duck. As far as he was concerned the boss's relationships was his own business. Wanda's assurance that whatever spirit they had run across wouldn't return till noon tomorrow at the earliest may have had something to do with it. He, like Pyro, was also pretending Sabertooth did not exist, whether for the sake of sanity or health is up in the air at this point.

"Pressed duck is very good. You have cooked well." grinning Peter poured ranch dressing on it and quickly devoured it, before making a move on the yams.

Ranko just grinned in response.

She'd cooked up a storm with Wanda's help. Wanda wasn't the best cook in the world, but she could follow directions with the best of them. Of course neither one had any idea what they should make for dinner, so they both had just paged through a cookbook and cooked anything that looked good. The resulting mix actually looked like the standard dinner for the Acolytes, who were known to do the same thing, but with rather less success at it.

Ranko was curled up in Wanda's lap feeding her sushi, although they tended to switch back and forth a lot. Magneto had seemed a bit embarrassed at first, but Emma's sudden appearance and claiming of her lap, as Sabersmurf had leapt onto the table, had distracted her enough to take her mind completely off her daughter's sexual preference.

Sabertooth was not a contented tent dweller. He was currently sitting on a full sized turkey as he chewed on a drum stick. Being reduced to ½ a foot high and painted blue was… just mildly upsetting, because as everyone could attest he was just a complete and udder sociopath big fluffy teddy bear at heart with a great sense of humor. What had really angered him however, was the sudden change in his vocabulary.

It wasn't commonly known, but Sabertooth considered himself a bit of a poet. Sure his poems were all composed of four letter words and helpful suggestions, which while not physically possible in most cases were however grammatically correct. No one had ever taken the time to really listen to what he was saying, because most human and mutants have a limit to the amount of profanity they can consciously process before it becomes meaningless filth, but if Andrew 'Dice' Clay had met him, he would have assured everyone they Sabertooth was a 'Fuckin' Genius'.

So it comes as no surprise that 'Sabersmurf' was beyond pissed and entering that delightful little zone that the mental health professionals would describe as 'psychotic rage'. All that was really missing from his life at this moment was a convenient target.

Ranma: evolution: Smurf or Die! [Episode 141613]

by dogbertcarroll

"What the smurf are you starring at, you smurfing idiot?"

Gambit stared blankly at the small blue figure on the table for a moment before answering absently, "When we start accepting Smurfs in t'ee Acolytes?"

A rumbling growl emanated from the small blue figure, that had been savagely devouring a turkey leg moments before. Normally one would assume that no smurf, no matter how savage, could be considered terrifying. One would quickly change their tune upon finding this particular smurf growling at them. Even the pansy white footie pants and hat did little to dispel the air of menace that Sabersmurf was radiating.

"Die!"

Despite his surprise Gambit's reflexes were quick enough to avoid Sabersmurf's initial leap, but Sabersmurf's rebound off the wall took him by complete surprise.

"OOOOFFF!"

Colossus shrugged and scooted his chair back, as the two rolled underneath the table, an assortment of curses and smurfes floating up through the table.

Grabbing a turkey leg Colossus began to make inroads in the turkey supply. He'd seen the two go at it before and with Sabertooth… smurfed, he was less worried then usual about how Gambit would do.

Ranko giggled and blushed as Wanda whispered something in her ear.

Wanda yawned in an exaggerated manner, "I think it's time for us to go to bed."

Magneto opened her mouth to say something, but the White Queen whispered something in her ear that froze her to the spot with her mouth hanging open.

Ranma wasn't sure what the White Queen had whispered, but Magneto was turning a bright red so it was probably something similar to what Wanda had suggested.

Normally Ranma would have been worried about what Wanda had planned, but it appeared that his luck had changed. He hadn't been malletted or called a pervert since he had arrived and Wanda had plenty of reasons to do both.

Wanda wrapped her arm around the blushing redhead and led her from the table before Magneto could open her mouth, or rather close it since she was still sitting with her mouth open and face a bright red.

Slipping off Magneto's lap, Emma kissed the side of her neck and giggled as she slipped out of the room.

Magneto closed her mouth and absently lifted her feet as Gambit and Sabersmurf rolled past.

Slamming his staff against Sabersmurf's head, Gambit managed to stun him long enough to fling his diminutive form into the hall and slam the door shut. A regular thumping noise, along with tiny fist sized dents in the steel, let Gambit know that Sabersmurf's quest to tear out Gambit's jugular vein was just beginning.

Panting he collapsed on a chair and guzzled down a glass of water, "So what did Gambit miss?"

The White Queen had slipped into something a little more comfortable and a lot less concealing. It looked like lingerie made out of dental floss, of course the reason for that was because it was lingerie made out of dental floss (Happosai's latest creation for the man who likes to floss after he eats. Available in mint as well as plain).

Fluffing the pillows on Magneto's bed she positioned herself for best effect and waited for her darling to arrive. Victoria's Secret's Happy Lingerie line had never failed to get her what she wanted and what she wanted was a certain silver haired C-cup, who was wonderfully bashful.

The lights were turned down low and Barry White was playing on the stereo as she waited for her prey partner to arrive.

Ranma: evolution: Current events! [Episode 147904]

by dogbertcarroll

Wanda pulled a reluctant 'Ranko' into her bathroom, as Ranma nervously muttered something about it not being proper for a boy and a girl to bathe together. Wanda noticed that despite the nervousness she displayed she was putting up only a token protest and her nipples looked about ready to cut through the dark blue blouse she had loaned her. The fact that Ranma had refused to wear a bra just made her that much easier to read.

"Well since we're both girls right now it's ok, right?" Her hands toyed with the buttons on her own matching dark blue blouse, drawing Ranma's eyes and further scattering her wits as she slowly unbuttoned her top.

"Hot water…" Ranma trailed off as Wanda's blouse dropped to the floor revealing a lacy black half-cup bra that stopped just above her nipples. Her breath caught in her throat as she watched Wanda slowly strip in front of her, clearly enjoying having Ranma watching.

"We'll take a cold shower then." Wanda smirked as she slowly slid her black leather mini-skirt down her stocking clad legs.

"Ok is not the word." Ranma answered her early question echoing a comment overheard from what seemed to be a lifetime ago, lust blazing in her eyes.

Gambit placed a hand on Magneto's shoulder and stared forcefully into her eyes, trying to impart a little strength of will into their badly shaken leader. "T'ere be mutants and mages t'at can make you male again if t'is spell don't wear off on its own, but t'ats not anything you need be worrying 'bout now."

"It's not?", Magneto asked, feeling quite relieved that being female was probably only going to be a temporary problem.

"No, it's not. You should be worrying about ole' Queeny waiting in t'e bedroom and expecting you to perform like t'e future leader of mutantkind with equipment you ain't never drove before."

All the blood drained from Magneto's face as the term 'performance anxiety' took on a whole new meaning.

The Kino Shrine had been a well respected place of spiritual cleansing before the latest generation had taken over. Hot springs had been changed into hot tubs and the mountain streams had been diverted into multiple waterfalls scattered throughout the area.

Steam arose from a nearby pool as a waterlogged panda, wearing a pair of garish green swim trunks, held up a wooden sign with an unreadable message on it.

The red headed women, relaxing in a hot tub and sipping a drink with a tiny umbrella in it, smiled as he went past, not bothering to try and read the sign, it had been soaked so many times that the ink had run. "Just six more hours dearest and all will be forgiven." she lied easily.

Genma sighed as he stepped out of the hot shower and headed back towards the icy cold waterfall for the thousandth time. The sudden temperature changes were definitely beginning to turn his skin blue. He made a mental note to remember to bring Ranma here for some training.

A handful of teenage mutants, sprawled around the living room in their run down boarding house, were just relaxing when one of their number turned his silver haired head towards the others and said the two words that were written in the book of ages as the signal to begin Armageddon.

"I'm Bored."


End file.
